HEADLINES [click on headline to view story]:

Family Money

Snap Shots

Modern Medicine

Practical Thai Law

Heart to Heart with Hillary

Bits ‘n’ Bobs

Animal Crackers

Personal Directions

Social Commentary by Khai Khem

Roll over Rover

Women’s World

Family Money: Inheritance Tax

By Leslie Wright,
Managing director of Westminster Portfolio Services (Thailand) Ltd.

Although I have written before on the complex issue of estate planning and inheritance tax, many people come to see me who are utterly confused by these issues, and not surprisingly.

Inheritance tax (IHT), or estate duty, or gift tax, or capital acquisition tax (or one of its many other guises), is one of the most complex taxes - particularly for cross-border issues, as almost every country applies different concepts and criteria when taxing inherited wealth.

IHT is usually levied in one of two different ways: an accession tax, or estate duty. Most countries use accession tax, levying inheritance tax on what the beneficiaries receive on the death of an individual. This system of inheritance tax is usually dependent on the relationship of the recipient to the deceased or the marital status between the deceased and the beneficiary.

Generally, the closer the relationship, the lower the rate of tax. In France, for example, the spouses, children and parents of the deceased benefit from the most generous exemption from the inheritance tax charge. Brothers and sisters receive an exemption of around one-third of this amount and all other beneficiaries about one-thirtieth.

All that remains
Estate tax is levied on the assets left by a person rather than the amount of property received by each beneficiary. Tax is, therefore, usually calculated by reference to the value of the estate.

Estate tax is a largely Anglo-American phenomenon; the US is a good example. The UK system, although called inheritance tax, levies a charge on the value of an estate before distribution to beneficiaries. The UK tax is levied on the value of assets on death but also on several lifetime transfers - into discretionary settlements after using the lifetime exemption, for example.

Contrast this with other regimes. The Irish do not have a formal inheritance or an estate tax but instead espouse a capital acquisition tax or gift tax regime on life or death. Italy has an estate tax, which is unusual for a continental jurisdiction, but also levies an IHT in addition to the estate tax if there are beneficiaries other than the spouse and direct lineal heirs.

Some jurisdictions do not have an actual estate or inheritance tax but still levy tax when a death occurs. In Australia, for example, death taxes were abolished in the 1970s but the Australians treat this as the disposal of an asset under the capital taxes regime in the same way as lifetime gifts. Similar principles apply in Canada.

Common or civil law?
Discovering which criteria apply in a jurisdiction can often be traced to whether the region adopted a common or civil law regime. The main criteria are nationality, location of assets, residence of the individual donor or beneficiary, domicile, and the territoriality principle.

A frequently used criterion is the residence of the donor/deceased person. If a person is resident in a jurisdiction that adopts this criterion, this usually means that the liability to IHT is unlimited and based on worldwide assets. This would apply in Italy, the Netherlands, Belgium and Sweden. But in Spain or Japan, the liability arises if the recipient is a resident of those countries. A combination of the two criteria is applied in Germany and Austria, which leads to an extremely comprehensive charge.

Worse still, the criteria for a “resident” changes from country to country. In some places, such as Greece and Italy, it is based on civil law concepts whilst in others, such as Belgium and Spain, the interpretation of residence is based on fact and circumstance.

Defining domicile
Domicile is mostly an Anglo-American concept although the definition differs slightly between the two jurisdictions. If one is adjudged “domiciled” in either the US, UK or Ireland, this is the basis for the imposition of worldwide taxation on the assets of the decedent. Domicile may be broadly described as “the place in which an individual has or is presumed to have his or her permanent home”.

Domicile can be acquired by birth (domicile of origin), by operation of law (dependency), and by choice. It is much less flexible than the concept of residence, more difficult to lose and often far more difficult to establish. Austria, Germany, Greece, the Netherlands and Sweden have all adopted nationality as the criterion for levying inheritance and gift taxes. If you are a US citizen or Green Card holder, you will also have an exposure on your worldwide estate.

In certain countries the application of estate gift and inheritance taxes is also dependent, in addition to the other criteria listed above, on the location or “situs” of the assets. In most states this can mean a limitation of the tax liability if the other criteria do not apply.

The application of the situs test may also vary depending on the type of property, such as real estate, moveable or immovable property, and so on. Situs may also be defined in a different way and the treatment of immovable property may vary considerably between countries. Occasionally the location or situs of the property is seen as the sole criterion for taxation, regardless of the nationality/domicile/residence of the donor or recipient, but this is rare. This is the principle in Monaco and Portugal and is known as the territoriality criterion.

Double taxation
There are many factors that constitute the jurisdictional basis of inheritance, estate and gift taxes. In most cases the liability is on global assets and double taxation may occur where cross border issues arise - for example, a French national with Portuguese property. Fortunately, this has been recognised and several tax treaties have concluded or reached agreement on unilateral measures.

The unilateral approach seems to be a more popular form of relief, as governments appear to expend less effort towards estate taxes than to income, capital gains and corporation tax. This is not wholly satisfactory as tax credits are often partial. Inevitably the highest rate within the two, three, or multi jurisdictions prevails.

This broad overview gives you some indication that specialist expert advice should be sought with regard to your estate planning: it can be a minefield for the unwary, and expensive for your heirs if not properly planned.

Snap Shot: Four reasons for using manual cameras

by Harry Flashman

With modern cameras able to produce perfect photographs, according to the publicity sheets if nothing else, why would I use a battered old Nikon, which is manual in operation? Am I too old to understand the new technology? Surely not, as again, according to the blurb, all I have to do is set the camera on A for Automatic and its little electronic chip brain does all the rest. I do not need to know “how” it does it.

Unfortunately, this is not the case, in fact quite the reverse, as there are many situations where your brains beat electronic brains. Do not listen to the technocrats, listen to Harry Flashman!

The first area is that of focussing. I have written about this many times, but modern auto-focus cameras deliver more “out of focus” shots than manually focussed cameras. Why? Simply because the camera’s electronic brain has no idea what the subject of your photograph really is. The electronic gizmos sharply focus on a small spot right in the centre of the viewfinder, and if that spot isn’t directly over your subject, you have just got yourself a fuzzy photo. A classic example is the shot of a couple. There are two heads, one each side of the magic central spot, which is then making the camera focus on the background, several kilometres away!

The next good reason to go manual is when you wish to take an action shot. You want to “stop” the motion, so you know you will need a fast shutter speed. Takes one twist of the dial and I’ve got 1/2000th of a second. With the fancy camera, you generally have to push a button to get the “menu”, scroll down to find the “action man” logo and select “on”. I was many times quicker than you - and, what’s more, I got to select the shutter speed I wanted. You get what the camera decides you want! There is a big difference in stopping a speeding railway train compared to stopping Miss Lotus Blossom as she jogs past your front gate. Manually you can select that faster shutter speed from the complete range - even to the point of allowing a little blur to show dynamic movement. The electronic brain cannot do that, sorry!

Likewise when you want to make the romantic portrait by the window. The suffused light from the white curtain makes for a soft quality to the photograph. But does the electronic brain know this? No! It hasn’t a clue. You have gone through the menu and scrolling bit, and now you (or rather “it”) have a camera ready to go in the “portrait” mode, with a wide open aperture to give a short depth of field. Unfortunately, as you compose the shot, all it “sees” is a strong area of light and reduces the amount of light going to fall on the film by upping the shutter speed (because the aperture is fixed in the portrait mode). Guess what this does? It gives you a pale background and dark, dark, features on the subject, and if your subject has a dusky skin to begin with you have just turned it black.

No, what that shot needs is a human brain that can dictate to the manual camera the exposure details needed for the correct exposure for the face, allowing the background to “flare” mistily around the subject. Microchips be damned!

Another area where the electronic brain is clueless is when you want to take tricky shots using the flash. By setting the aperture and the flash power together, I can then, by fiddling around with the shutter speed, lighten or darken the background, even in daylight! Yes, by having total manual control I can use the flash at full power in the bright sun, something the electronic brain would consider a no-no!

For creativity and the sheer “joy” of photography, use your brain instead of the camera’s one. Yours is much better!

Modern Medicine: Antibiotics

by Dr Iain Corness, Consultant

Perhaps one of the greatest discoveries in medicine was the antibiotic. For countless centuries mankind (and women too!) died from bacterial diseases. Microbes that could bring armies to their knees went unchecked. Plagues decimated populations, but smarty pants that we are, we developed antibiotics and we reversed the tables. “Human beings kill millions of bacteria” could even be the headline for a newspaper!

However, it wasn’t that easy. We did develop antibiotics. They did kill bacteria. But the bacteria did not take all this lying down either. They developed new strains which became resistant to the antibiotics and started to become rampant again. We, in retaliation, developed new antibiotics and the balance of power returned to our favour. After all, the “good guys” should be the winners!

But are we? There has been a price to pay for all our “smartness” with now a plethora of pills and potions. That price is even more noticeable in countries like Thailand, where self medication is the norm. The price includes more antibiotic resistant strains of bacteria, more symptoms caused by the antibiotics themselves and an overgrowth of other organisms such as yeasts.

This was all brought home to me the other day when I chanced upon a discussion in my city office. The manager had a chronic sinus condition and was raking through his desk drawer to see what “antibiotic” he had to combat this. Coming across some self prescribed amoxycillin he asked me what did I think. I replied that I considered that it was probably next to useless for a chronic sinus condition, so he put them back in his desk. However, the office girl piped up that she needed some, so she would have them! Now both of them are intelligent people and I consider them as friends, but the medical training that either of them has had in pharmaceuticals, let alone clinical medicine, is one big fat zero. Yet both of them feel qualified to prescribe potent medications for themselves. This is potentially dangerous.

Coming to the sinus problem - amoxycillin, one of the earlier penicillin derivatives, is not an antibiotic which gets good tissue levels in the sinus region and by this time, most bacteria which inhabit the ear-nose-and throat have long since become resistant to amoxycillin. For my money, taking amoxycillin for his chronic sinus problem is a waste of his money!

Now the young lady - it turned out that her symptoms were not pathological, but represented a normal situation. If she had taken the amoxycillin she would have ended up with a severe attack of “Thrush” an irritating complaint that ladies can well do without.

So in these cases, indiscriminate antibiotics would have been a waste of money and not done the trick for one person and given the other another nasty condition as well. Perhaps now you can see why I am not altogether in favour of self medication with prescription drugs. If it were just a case of “any old antibiotic will do” then it would be different, however, antibiotic prescribing is a sensitive and difficult area of medicine.

Going back to our friend amoxycillin, adverse effects include superinfection, a nasty type of bowel disease and liver and blood disturbances as well as interacting badly with the contraceptive pill and gout medication. Is it worth it? See your doctor instead!

Practical Thai Law: Child Prostitution and Sex Tourism

by Premprecha Dibbayawan - MCL Miami University Chairman - International Swiss Siam Co., Ltd.

Ten years ago the press were not that interested in reporting on tourists caught committing paedophilic acts because the cases were so numerous. Walking down South Pattaya Street in those days one could see many boys and girls selling items such as chewing gums, cigarettes, condoms etc. who were, in fact, really offering their bodies for sex with customers.

Nowadays public awareness has been raised and child sex is no longer tolerated by society. On the contrary, the United Nations, governments around the world and many NGOs have raised paedophilia to the status of a serious crime to be urgently suppressed. There are hundreds of organizations throughout the world working against the Commercial Sexual Exploitation of Children, Child Pornography, Child Sex Tourism, Children’s Rights and so on. In Thailand there are the Center for the Protection of Children’s Rights, End Child Prostitution and Trafficking (Thailand) [ECPAT,], a branch of ECPAT International. These organizations research the subject and publish many reports, few of which do not mention Pattaya, which they call ‘Fantasy Island’.

My articles in this column will concentrate on this subject for a while as it will help Pattaya if people, both those practicing this nefarious act and others to be aware of the legal aspects of having sex with children. If one walks along a street and accepts the sexual solicitation of a child or solicits the child to have sex, what would be the offences committed, how many counts? Let us look at this precedence case.

Supreme Court Case No. 2591/2540, Public Prosecutor vs. Karl-Heinz Brands. In 1994, the defendant took four boys aged between 11 and 13 years to his room. He then caused all the boys to strip naked and touch their own and each other’s genitals and took photographs of them. The children were taken from the streets and from a department store. He was charged with indecent acts with children, production of obscene material for commercial purpose, taking children away from their custodians and encouraging children to commit inappropriate acts. The Court of First Instance found him guilty of all counts and sentenced him to 43 years and 4 months imprisonment and a fine of 1,000 baht.

The Appeal Court dismissed the charge of “taking the children away from their custodians” because the children were not under any known guardianship and were picked up from the streets and a department store. The other charges were sustained and the sentence then reduced to 4 years and 2 months.

The Supreme Court confirmed the decision of the Appeal Court giving the reasons that the children ran away from home; were begging on streets and slept in public places and were therefore, not under the custody of parents or guardians. The court also found that the defendant did not take the children away from custodians. The finding of the Supreme Court immediately created immense dissatisfaction at the Center for the Protection of Children’s Rights, who filed a petition to the Ministry of Justice claiming that the finding of the Court contradicted the Convention on the Rights of the Child (CRC), to which Thailand is a party.

After the complaint from CRC it became definite that if a child under 15 years of age is taken for sexual purposes, even with the consent of the child, the man (or woman) will be guilty of “taking away a child from a custodian”. The claim of CRC is now supported by Section 53 of the Constitution of the Kingdom of Thailand, B.E. 2540 which states:

“Children, youths and family members shall have the right to be protected by the State against violence and unfair treatment.”

“Children and youths with no guardian shall have the right to receive care and education from the State, as provided by law.”

The new interpretation can now be understood as: even when the children are not under the custody of their parents, they are under the guardianship of the State.

In conclusion and even ignoring the heinous immorality of such acts, it is just not worth involving oneself in such activities. Although the civil compensation for damages in Thailand may not seem to be severe and the statute of limitations may be fairly short, you must now remember that you can be tried for paedophilia and even sued in your own country for damages - as has already happened in Japan when a Thai man sued a Japanese for sex abuse and won his case.

More stories of the same nature in later issues.

Heart to Heart with Hillary

Dear Hillary,

I remain utterly flabbergasted that every week, or it seems that way, you will get another letter from a broken hearted male who has lost another house and several ounces of gold to another young Thai hussy. That is after the buffalo has had its expensive injections to get it on its feet again. Does nobody warn these people that this is the most likely outcome? Perhaps you should have a notice inserted in the Pattaya Mail that Thai women are a wealth hazard!

Browned Off

Dear Browned Off,

Are you hurting, Petal? It sounds that way to me. You do not say where you came from, but all the western so-called developed countries have their own financial hazards in the men and women stakes. Called divorce settlements and alimony, these are resulting in many men walking the streets of Pattaya rueing the fact that they have lost several houses, cars and been made poor by the women in their own country. In America they are even drawing up “pre-nuptial” agreements as a form of “damage control” to try and quantify and contain the loss on splitting up. Since more than 50% of first marriages end in divorce in the western world, that’s a lot of houses out there in the matrimonial maelstrom. Hillary remains absolutely flabbergasted that people such as you protest so loudly your amazement that this happens here, as if it didn’t in your own countries. If you don’t believe me go your local Chicken Pluckers Arms in the UK and take a straw poll of how many men have lost everything but their shirts to some English women. You get off lightly over here. Hillary does also take you to task, branding all Thai/Farang marriage failure females as being hussies. Would you say the same about British women? Or Americans?

Dear Hillary,

My in-laws are coming out for their first holiday to Thailand from Scotland and my wife and I were wondering if you could recommend some places for us to take them? They are both in their 50’s, active and reasonably broad-minded, though nothing too shocking please. We are just a little worried with this being their first trip even outside Scotland.

Roger

Dear Roger,

Is that “Jolly” Roger, I wonder? How long have you lived in Pattaya? You must have an idea of what is on offer in and around Pattaya, and if you haven’t you should go and visit these places yourself. Really it depends on what they want to see. The Sriracha Tiger Zoo is a popular venue, as is Nong Nooch Tropical Gardens as daytime entertainment. Likewise one of the elephant parks should be on the agenda - pachyderms being a fairly rare sight in the Highlands of Scotland. Shopping is always high up on the agenda for visitors, and since the in-laws come from the land of the locked sporran, some of the bargain places such as the Made in Thailand Market on Pattaya 2nd Road would be interesting for them. Wanasin Farm is another appealing venue with its floating market, not on the same scale as the one in Bangkok, but fun, nevertheless. Horseshoe Point has equestrian shows if they are into horses, but no Clydesdales I’m afraid. At night there are the transvestite cabarets, and do not forget the little Malibu on the corner of Soi Post Office and Pattaya 2nd Road. Pubs appealing to the 50+ age groups would include Shenanigans and the Green Bottle (though all ages are welcome). You should also take them along Soi Pattayaland 2 for the most amazing neon light displays and also perfectly “safe” go-go dancing. As far as dining is concerned, get yourself a copy of Miss Terry Diner’s Dining Out Guide Pattaya 2002 (available in Bookazine and many other bookshops) and you can choose between local Thai cuisine to the top 5 star restaurants. Stop worrying, the in-laws will love the place.

Dear Hillary,

We have just arrived in your beautiful country and expect to be here in Pattaya for two years. Since I will be working I am not worried about filling in my time here, but my wife, who is a little shy is fairly nervous about this. This is our first overseas posting so any advice you can give her is appreciated.

Lester

Dear Lester,

Tell your wife she has nothing to worry about. This is indeed a beautiful country and she should do all she can to explore and enjoy it. There are many clubs and organizations in Pattaya and the Pattaya International Ladies Club would be a good place to start. They have organised tours to places of interest, both locally and in Bangkok. You can find the contact details in the Pattaya Mail in the “Clubs in Pattaya” page. There are also many charity groups who are always looking for people to help with the poor, the handicapped and those who are orphaned. The Jesters Care for Kids group are looking for volunteers. There is more than enough to keep your wife occupied. Next you will be writing in to say she’s never home!

Bits ‘n’ Bobs

Animal Crackers: Racoons - Masked Bandits

By Mirin E Mc Carthy

Racoons are highly intelligent and cute looking mammals about the size of a huge cat. Readily identified by their unique bandit like black mask across their eyes, and down onto their cheeks and their distinctively banded black and yellow large bushy tails. Their appearance is inquisitive looking, with round faces and white patches above the eyes and around their short noses. Ears are small, and bodies sturdy with, thick, grayish brown fur. They average a meter in length (3 feet) including the tail, and can weigh between 7 to 22 kg (15 to 48 pounds), males averaging 8.5 kg.

Clever Hands

Equalling primates in intelligence, their paws and toes are shaped like human hands and used the same way to hold and identify objects. Perhaps this is part of their appeal. Names reflecting their manual dexterity are: in Chippewa “Esseeban” and Cree; “Essebanes” meaning, “They who pick up things.” The French-Canadians called them “Chat Sauvage” or European wildcat. Racoons were given the scientific name Procyon Lotor as “lotor” means “the washer.” Perhaps because raccoons have been observed dunking aquatic food in water before eating it. When hunting for crayfish or clams racoons often feel around in the water under stones and rocks with their paws and dip prey in the water a few times while eating; however, they do not habitually dunk all their food. Racoons just like to play and play with objects in the water, food and otherwise.

U.S Citizens

Racoons are found over most of North and South America and southern Canada, except in the western mountain ranges. Revered by Native Americans and early settlers, raccoons were once considered the American national animal. They inhabit many different locations, favouring wooded areas near streams, ponds, and marshes. As humans have moved into raccoon habitat, this clever little creature has proven more adaptable than most. For nesting sites it prefers warm, dry, dark, easily protected areas. In the wild, it dens in tree hollows, hollow logs, or sometimes rocky caverns. In urban areas, raccoons often nest in drainpipes, basements, crawl spaces and house attics. Raccoon populations now are actually densest in suburban and urban areas.

Eat Everything

Nocturnal but occasionally active in daytime, raccoons are really omnivorous, eating whatever their environment provides. In the wild they eat fish, frogs, turtles, insects, worms, snails, birds, eggs, grubs, snakes, rats, shrews, also nuts and fruit seasonally. In farmlands, they feed on corn crops, poultry, mice and orchard vegetables and fruit. In urban areas, an easily opened garbage can and dog and cat food is irresistible.

Sociable

They are fairly sociable and often den with other raccoons and are sometimes found hunting in small groups of three to six, probably consisting of a single family. In colder regions, raccoons may sleep for a large part of the winter, in the summer they find shady, cool places to rest. They are territorial with limited private ranges, approximately 1 mile in diameter. Often their territories overlap with those of other raccoons but boundary clashes are rare. When confronting each other, they often growl or snarl threateningly but seldom fight.

Their call from spring to autumn is an infrequent loud tremulous whistle. Other noises are a rasping scream when suddenly frightened, a hissing cry to scold young and a loud purr when pleased. Baby racoons make an “orr-orr-orr” cry when begging food and whimper pitifully when hungry or deserted.

Females produce one litter a year, numbering from one to six kits and averaging four or five; they live for 10 to 13 years in the wild. Raccoons may appear bold and tend to bite when provoked but usually are not aggressive except during mating season or when defending their young. However, their strength, teeth, and claws equip them to defend themselves effectively. These cute little bandits are important links in the chain of life, controlling pests such as mice, rats, and snakes.

Personal Directions: Happiness is Contagious

by Christina Dodd, founder and managing director 
of Incorp Training Associates

If you walk into a party and see two groups of people, one laughing and smiling, the other moping and frowning, which will you want to stand near? Not a tough question to answer is it?

“Cheerfulness keeps up a kind of daylight in the mind, and fills it with a steady and perpetual serenity.” - Joseph Addison

People recognize positive (happy) people and they want to be around them. Happiness is tremendously infectious and attractive. It’s a comfortable and pleasurable “place to be” and even if it’s only for a short while, it brings joy and laughter. Happiness is contagious! If you make the effort to be happy yourself, the people around you will become happy. It’s a simple principle, but one that many people forget to adhere to and to employ.

Of course it’s easy to be happy when everything is going your way. But if you think about it, it’s far more important to be happy when things aren’t going your way. If you can adopt an optimistic outlook in every situation, you will find that you are helping to create that outcome by everything you say and do. Being optimistic (and happy) is really that powerful.

It’s quite amazing how we mirror the behaviour of those around us. Many a time I’ve been at a function and mixed with the crowd, having a chat here and there and saying hello to as many people as I can. And often I’ll come across a group of people who perhaps could be a touch more lively, rather than drowning themselves in all the day’s problems or the bleak outlook the economy has taken. I find that if I stay too long around that particular group, I’ll become somewhat infected by the same glum tone and attitude that has engulfed them. Mostly I’ll try to add a bright and more positive or constructive note to the conversation to steer it towards something more enjoyable. I think it is worth every ounce of effort.

Our attitudes - either positive or negative - are infectious and lead to positive or negative outcomes.

We do, however, live in the real world where life is full of adversity and this is something we cannot ignore or overlook. But if we are not careful and choose to be more negative than positive in our attitudes and approach to life and all the difficulties that come with it, we will only end up wallowing in the mud of negative thinking. This mud is thick and will stick and dry rock-hard, making it all the more uncomfortable and difficult to remove.

There are constructive and positive ways to look at life and to deal with all its problems that confront us. Worrying, it could be said, is thinking about what could go wrong. The antidote to this is therefore to consciously dwell on what could go right! I think it makes good sense and for far more promising results.

This subject reminds me of a workshop I ran where we focused on “laughter” as one of the modules of the second training day. Everyone had been quite tense during the first day’s program due to certain expectations placed upon them and in order to relieve the underlying tension we did a simple exercise together which showed how powerful and beneficial laughter (happiness) can be.

Each person was given a mirror to hold in front of them and to look at. They had to look at themselves and smile and then begin to laugh. At first this was a little awkward, but as minutes went by, one by one they began to smile and then giggle and laugh. In a matter of what seemed to be no time at all the whole room of thirty people was suddenly bubbling and bursting with noise and energy and sounds of enthusiastic laughter - and all the positive aspects that go hand in hand with it. The smiles were wide and beaming after that and the workshop moved along at a roaring pace!

There’s a lot to be said for having a good laugh. Laughter is like having a good dose of medicine. We as humans like to laugh as we know we can receive immediate gratification in the way it makes us feel. It feels great doesn’t it! When we have a real hearty laugh then it feels ten times better! And if we are with others all having a good old laugh together - then we are in trouble because we can’t stop and start gasping for air until we exhaust ourselves and begin to double over and roll onto the floor. Yes - laughter is good medicine.

When parents are around a baby and it begins to giggle and gooh and make all those sounds babies make - just watch their behaviour. They make faces and emit the most extraordinary noises and do the silliest things. They mirror the baby’s behaviour just as we all mirror the behaviour of people around us.

When we are happy - we do things differently. We act differently. We walk and talk differently. We think differently. We influence others to behave differently and in a positive way. Even though we may be carrying enormous problems on our shoulders, the act and state of being happy is a tremendous motivator, encouraging us to continue on and to overcome obstacles that come our way every day of our lives.

Christina can be contacted by email at christina.dodd @in corptraining.com or directly at Incorp Training Associates in Bangkok. Tel: (02) 6521867-8 or Fax: (02) 652 1870. Programs and services can be found at Incorp’s website www.incorptrain ing.com

Social Commentary by Khai Khem

Mother’s Day - for people who have lost their mothers - is unlike any other day of the year

With that in mind, I talked with a woman - now 45 years old - who lost her mother to cancer a few years ago. As Mother’s Day was approaching she was feeling an aloneness that surprised her.

After all, she wasn’t a child - she was well along in her life. But now her mother was gone. Her mother had died in a hospital in Bangkok. The daughter had been holding her. They had been doing that a lot; the daughter would lie next to her mother in the hospital bed, and just hold her to comfort her. The trivia of the world was all around them. But none of it mattered.

The daughter was a schoolteacher, single and not thrilled about it, and uncertain about what lay ahead for her. As her mother was dying, she thought: “I don’t know how I will get over this.”

She told me that she had called her mother on the telephone every night of her life since the time she was in college. Her mother had always told her that she was a good daughter, that she was doing well in her life (even during the times when she herself wasn’t so sure of that) and that if she got married, or didn’t get married, that was okay too.

When the mother drew her last breath, she lay in the arms of her daughter. This wasn’t frightening and it wasn’t awful and it wasn’t terrible. She died in the arms of her child, knowing that she was loved.

But as each Mother’s Day approaches, something makes the woman especially sad. There were nights when she would be getting ready for bed, and she would realize she had not thought about her mother that day. “Is this what happens?” she asked herself. “Life just goes on?”

My friend said that her greatest fear would be that she would somehow forget about her mother. However, this has never happened. She said the older she gets, and the more experiences she goes through, the more her mother is a part of her life. She thinks about her every day because she carries the memory of her mother in her heart. If she is having trouble making decisions or choices, she often asks herself what her mother would have done in her place; would she have handled things?

The daughter found a new job. Met and married a wonderful man and they now have two lovely children, a new house, and a new life. Her big regret is that her mother never saw her grandchildren. Then she hesitates for a moment and tells me that’s not exactly true. She is certain her mother is watching over her and knows about each milestone the daughter encountered since her mother died.

While we were talking, my friend finally laughed. She said every day she gets older she sees her mother’s face looking back at her in the mirror, and when she looks down at her hands, she sees her mother’s hands. The woman has realized that her mother will always be a part of her - the best part.

Roll over Rover: Try not ruin a good dog

by C. Schloemer

Some owners prefer to send their dogs to school and have professionals train their dogs. Many dog owners with pedigree pooches want them either trained for special jobs, unique activities such as hunting, show-ring, guard duty or special obedience training.

If anyone is going through, or is planning to go through with the job of training a pedigree dog for whatever reasons, do choose your trainer carefully. Just any old trainer will not do.

Training schools for dogs (like schools for children, restaurants and shops, medical treatment and day care for children and the homes for the elderly) vary in quality and professionalism. Owners who truly value their dogs must be prepared to shop around and do some checking into who will be handling their dog and what kind of methods they use.

Animal training is much like parenting. Any moron can bring a child into this world. But only an understanding and caring person can become a good parent and raise a child properly. Some parents are abusive. Some dog trainers use abusive and aggressive methods to train dogs.

Let me introduce you to a lovely 10 month old Chesapeake Bay Retriever named Manny. Manny’s owners were posted to Thailand by a company for 2 years and arrived from Canada. The Bay Retriever is a favorite with North American sportsmen. Not widely kept as a household pet, its webbed feet and oily, water resistant coat make it well suited for retrieving water foul. Manny, however was only a few months old and was adapting rather well in the family’s small townhouse and Thailand’s hot climate. The owners merely wanted someone to teach the young pup some basic manners.

Their choice of ‘trainer’ was poor. After pronouncing that Bay Retrievers are ‘one-person’ dogs and can be aggressive, the trainer dragged Manny around by a choke-chain, yelling commands and jerking the chain, assuring the owners that “this is the way it has always been done.”

This trainer’s method of pain and force did not work. Manny resisted the aggressive interaction, then became nervous, agitated, and finally sunk his large teeth into the trainer’s leg. Manny’s point of view? “I guess I’d better get him before he gets me!” The trainer’s opinion? “You see! I TOLD you Bay Retrievers can be aggressive!”

This unfortunately is all too common. Ninety percent of dog aggression problems come from using adversarial training methods. In Western countries dogs with aggressive psychological problems are killed, euthanasia, simply because the owners don’t know what to do about it, or how the dog got that way.

For dog owners who are training their own dogs, here are some tips and reminders for training and correction.

Golden rules

1. Never, never hit your dog.

2. When heeling your dog, never stop for him. Keep walking. You are the leader and he must follow you. When repetitive training is in session, walk in squares, not in circles. Maintain eye contact. Speak only the commands. Pet your dog and praise him when he does it right, and be generous when he makes a mistake.

3. Always be in the position to correct the dog before any command is given.

4. You must be aware of para-language. This means coordinate your voice command with your body language. Conflicting signals will confuse him.

5. All corrections must be immediately followed by praise.

6. Try not to repeat a command. Easier said than done, I know.

7. Quick response time on giving commands is imperative. Quick commands receive quick response.

8. Use the dog’s name, to get his attention, before all commands, with the exception of the word “NO”.

9. Correction must be firm enough for the dog to want to work to avoid it but not aggressive or combative.

10. Certain behavioral patterns may require confinement when you can’t observe the dog. Observe the dog when you can’t confine it.

11. Strive for perfection through repetition on leash, and then gradually transition to off-leash. Never leave a training collar or choke chain on your dog when unattended.

12. You must be consistent.

Women’s World: The story of two women Part I

by Lesley Warmer

I asked Christine, “Why?”

She told me, “In my former life I was a faithful husband to three wives but I never had any children. I felt no particular difficulty with the role of a man but in retrospect can see that there were obvious signs that things were not as they should be. For example my undue interest in what my wife wore and the makeup she chose. It took me a number of years to discover what I really wanted from life.”

I asked, “How did you eventually discover the truth?” She smiled and said, “One day about 5 years ago a friend invited me to a turnabout party, where men can dress as women. I had a really great time and from then on started to dress as a woman more often.”

Christine as a chief engineer in Indonesia and Singapore, still posing as a man, but managing to confuse the rest of the population as to her real gender.

Shortly afterwards she visited a clinic to talk to a specialist about hormones, and during the visit she had liver and kidney function checks to make sure that it was safe for her to take the hormones. She told me it can be quite risky because of the large doses needed. The doctor prescribed hormone 1.25mg to be increased to 2.5mg in the second month continuing to increase the dose until she reached 7.5mg, she also takes second hormone. (It is advisable to consult a doctor before taking any drugs, the Bangkok Pattaya Hospital have a team of specialists always willing to advise.)

Christine continued to work on a ship as a chief engineer in Indonesia and Singapore, still posing as a man, but managing to confuse the rest of the population as to her real gender.

Taking a break she came on holiday to Thailand and stayed in Pattaya. During her stay she asked the manageress if she would mind if she dressed as a woman, the hotel staff had no objections. After this she started spending 4 months on the ship as a man and 2 months on holiday in Pattaya as a woman. She enjoyed being a woman far more so she decided to do something more radical about making it permanent.

One of the people Christine met during her recuperation in Pattaya was Grace, so she decided to visit her while she was in England and they became partners.

Last September she left the ship and came to Pattaya to have the SRS (Sex Reassignment Surgery), and she had the operation in October 2001. She had every intention of returning to the ship as Christine, to continue her job but first she went to England on holiday. She told me, “For the journey to England I started by dressing as a man and then thought, no-way, so I changed my clothes and traveled as a woman, from then on I never looked back. When I arrived In England I changed all my certificates, except of course my birth certificate which you can’t change in Great Britain.” (Although this may change in the future if the UK goes along with Europe. The rest of Europe maintains it is an infringement of rights to prevent a person changing their birth certificate, therefore leaving them free to marry as they wish).

One of the people Christine met during her recuperation in Pattaya was Grace, so she decided to visit her while she was in England and they became partners.

Christine told me that when she applied to have her job back she was told that the company policy had changed and she was unable to return to the ship, so she returned to live in Pattaya and assist other people like herself who need to fulfill their destiny.