Riz Taylor
It seemed as though the football had been away forever, and then, suddenly, we seem to be completely back into the swing of things. It didn’t take long - one Premiership weekend has passed and already my voice has accustomed itself to more shouting at telly. Alcohol intake is up thirty per cent, swearing even more so, and ‘Her Indoors’ is already bracing herself for another nine months of having to rearrange our love life around the fixture schedule. Yep, it was quite an enjoyable weekend.
That can’t be said of everyone, of course. Miserable Tottenham fans bombarded radio phone-ins with their tales of unending pain after their side’s hopeless display against Sunderland in the season’s opener. It was a terrible game - my apologies for talking it up last week, I’ll make it up to you - and Roy Keane’s men just about deserved their injury time winner.
Such is Keane’s stock at the moment that even the signing of Michael Chopra during the summer layoff raised little discontent amongst the locals. Five million pounds for a striker yet to really prove much at the top level is enough cause for concern, but when you consider that Chopra went to the same school as Alan Shearer and was signed up by Newcastle at the age of 12 you’ll begin to understand the strength of the magical spell that the Irishman has over his loyal followers.
That spell had seen Sunderland rise from the depths of Championship despair last season to be promoted as champions, and so it continues as Keane brought on Chopra as a 72nd minute substitute at the weekend. Twenty minutes later the former Magpie was on hand to grab all three points with the latest of late winners.
“Sometimes it’s hard for a sub,” said Keane. “At this level strikers are lucky to get one or two touches in the box. You’ve got to be decisive. A lot of the top strikers’ goals are from six, seven yards out, not 25 yards out - the Van Nistlerooys of this world, the Linekers. Chops had one chance and we won the game 1-0. Beautiful.”
Beautiful for Keane perhaps, but not so for the rest of us that tuned in for a beautiful game. Such is life.
Yet such is the relentless bombardment of fixtures that it left us with barely any time to ponder just how awful Tottenham were as Manchester City, fresh with new investment and new faces on the pitch, in the dugout and even in the boardroom, kicked off their season against West Ham United.
It could easily turn out to have been a fixture between last season’s headline hoggers and this season’s equivalent. West Ham took up more inches of this column than any other side during the last twelve months with their dodgy East End wheeler dealing, but Manchester City look like making a big challenge for the attention this time around.
Sven Goran Eriksson, the former England manager who I’m absolutely convinced would be right at home in Pattaya when he trades in his suit for an ill-fitting vest, shorts and pair of flip-flops, has taken over the reigns at City and true to form has immediately begun shelling out on foreign imports, conducting boring press conferences and chatting up the female staff at the club. Or at least two of those.
Lots of the new arrivals were on show on Saturday as the side eased to a 2-0 victory over the Hammers with Brazilian midfielder Elano in particular making an instant impact, but what might have gone amiss is that five players that have made their way through the side’s youth system were also on show. Perhaps Eriksson can reinvigorate English football after all. Who’d have thought it?
Newcastle looked impressive as they thumped Bolton 3-1, Big Sam Allardyce claiming the win over his successor Little Sam (Sammy Lee) at the Reebok Stadium. “Newcastle just played like us last year, really,” said Bolton’s Kevin Nolan. Did that really come as a surprise?
Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool all scraped wins on the opening weekend, but whilst Steven Gerrard’s stunning free kick deserved to top the headlines, the biggest news came from Old Trafford. Wayne Rooney will miss the next two months after breaking a metatarsal bone in his foot for the third time in three years. It’s these fancy modern boots, I tell you. Oh, and United drew with Reading 0-0.
Bad news for United fans then, so let’s leave things on a positive note with a quote from one of United’s favourite sons. “To me it’s a different club to two years ago,” said Roy Keane on Saturday, talking about Sunderland of course. “There’s a different attitude to everybody, there’s a different mentality. When I woke up this morning I thought, ‘This is where you want to be’. You know it takes a lot to get me excited, just ask my wife. This is the place to be, let me tell you.”
I have the same thoughts about the television at the weekend now the football is back. There’s more of the same this weekend, starting with Pompey against Bolton on Saturday in the early kick off at Fratton Park followed by Newcastle hosting Aston Villa. On Sunday there’s Liverpool against Chelsea following on from the day’s first game, the small matter of the Manchester derby. Lovely.
You what?
You what?
The Premiership is dead - long live the Premier League. The FA Barclays Premiership is now called the “Barclays Premier League”. Research with fans and other global stakeholders said that the division “showed the need for a single unified identity”. The FA part has disappeared. Keen to keep up with its more famous neighbours the division formerly known as the Conference has become the Blue Square Premier after a change of sponsor. The two feeder leagues (formerly Conference North and Conference South) are now known as the Blue Square North and the Blue Square South.
Whatever. I’m still calling it the Conference. And whilst we’re at it, can we change “The Championship” as well?
The worst ever
England defender Jonathan Woodgate has been voted the worst signing of the 21st century by readers of a Spanish football website. The 27-year-old was the runaway winner of a poll run by marca.com, claiming an overwhelming 37.11 per cent of the votes.
Real Madrid signed Woodgate from Newcastle United for 13.4 million pounds in August 2004 but he didn’t make his debut until 13 months later due to a thigh injury. That debut was a disaster as Woodgate scored an own goal and was then sent off during the league match against Athletic Bilbao at the Bernabeu. Having made only 14 competitive appearances for Real Madrid, Woodgate moved on loan to Middlesbrough in August 2006 and then completed a permanent move last year at a loss of over seven million pounds to the Spanish side.

Happy Birthday Caddy Shack

IPGC golf from The Caddy Shack

Roy Mitchell
Tuesday, August 7, Bangpra, 4-Man Scramble
Tuesday was the first anniversary of the opening of the Caddy Shack at its new premises in Soi 17. To celebrate the occasion, 56 golfers set off to play a 4-man scramble at Bangpra, and what a great competition it was.
With this amount of people it is always a worrying time regarding checking in and tee-off times, but the staff and starters at the course did an excellent job and everything went smoothly.
The first group went out in ideal conditions and it was soon obvious that the scores were going to be low. Tactics regarding whose drive to use in this format are a vital component and the team captain has to make some important decisions. A predicted score of sub net 60 was forecast and the large field did not disappoint.
In third place was the team of Brian Jacks, Phil Smith, Ian Dunkey and Curtis Hessler with a net 59.4. In second came Phil Mitchell, Roy Mitchell, Paul Smith and Paul Butler on net 59.1. But out in front after shooting 11 birdies was the team comprising of Glen Cunningham, Gerry Cooney, Murray Greig and Colin Greig with a net score of 57.2.
Near Pin awards went to Paul Smith, Curtis Hessler, Bruce Tollitt and Phil Mitchell. Damian Trante had the nearest the pin second shot on hole number 10 and Phil Mitchell won the long drive award. Thanks go to Damian, Big Ron and Alistair Templeton for their sponsorship of the technical prizes.
Following the presentations, a superb buffet and some live music by the San Miguel Band kept the players and guest entertained into the wee hours. Everyone agreed it had been a great day and will be looking forward to the second anniversary next year.
Friday, August 10, Crystal Bay, Stableford
Friday was a trip to Crystal Bay on a cloudy day for a stableford comp over the A & B courses. As usual there was a good turnout for this popular course but good scores were hard to come by.
In third place came Clive Bruce on 34 points, second was Graham Dietrich with 35 points and the winner was putting genius Bill Hewitt with a level par 36 points.
There were four 2’s shared between Steve Durey, Bill Hewitt, Kevin Wilson and Roy Mitchell. It must be said that the competitions and atmosphere at the Caddy Shack this week will be long remembered.

Turners make it a ‘family day’ at Phoenix

Phoenix Members Golf Group

Mike Gerrard
Wednesday, August 8, Stableford
Back from the soaking jungles of the north it was nice to get back to some civilisation and a golf course. However the threat of rain generally kept a few of our regulars away today. Bad luck for them. There was no rain and with overcast skies the temperature was way down and very comfortable. So much so that walking the course was easy.
There was some sadness as we passed the house on the second hole on the Mountain course, doffing our hats to our dear departed friend Gerry Carpenter. He will be sadly missed by all.
The winner today was Peter Herning with 40 points with Terry O’Conner a close second with 39 points. Technical prizes went to Ron Bridge (2), Paul Ainsworth, and Bob Deane, with Neil Mcallister claiming the lucky draw.
Friday, August 10, Stableford
Another cool, overcast day but no rain. Perfect, just like playing in Europe on a good summers day, but with the obvious differences of being in fun city (or close)
It’s tiger tee day on Friday so scoring is not so high as usual.
The winner today with 34 points was Phil Smith, with our chairman Ron Bridge, on the same score, coming in second but just losing out on count back. ‘Tall Trees’ Terry Turner claimed third spot with 33 points.
No one scored a ‘2’ today so the competition will be carried over to next week.
Sunday, August 12, Stableford
With all the overcast skies blown away and the sun breaking through we had a good group of players out today to tackle the Mountain and Lakes courses. Ocean is closed at the moment for preparatory work for the high season.
With it being HM The Queen’s birthday and the course being very busy, the going was a little slow, but with the marshals and caddies working well no one had cause to get too upset.
It was lovely to see three generations of the same family teeing off together: Terry Turner, being the oldest and tallest, with his son Scott Turner, and in turn his son Jake Turner. With Jake growing up quickly I wonder if we will ever see the day when we have a four-generation team on the tee?
Sunday Members golf at Phoenix has now become the most popular social golf day in town (or should I say out of town), due to our handicapping system that makes it very unlikely that you will see the same person win twice in a row. The higher the score the more the handicap is adjusted down. This week being no exception, our winner will be cut 10 shots.
Well the winner this week was Yukio, with yours truly in second and Neil McAllister coming in third. Technical awards went to Doug Wilson, Neil Mcallister (2) and Scott Turner.
Reminder: We are now running our own domestic handicap system for members’ group golf days with strong overtones of the CONGU system, but with differences. All members and guests will be able to qualify for this system under the rules applied. As long as you have an official handicap you can start on the first day. Without an official handicap we will get you into our system after 3 scores have been submitted. The max. handicap for men will be 28 and for ladies 36. For more information please contact any committee member or come along and all will be explained
Our next notable date is the last Wednesday of the month being Monthly Mug Day. Please sign up early for this one.

Bowling Green golfers are on the move

PSC golf from the Travellers Rest

Barry Hooper
Well here is the “Big News.” The Bowling Green golfers are moving to a new golfing venue. Starting this week, golf will be arranged and leave from “The Travellers Rest” in Soi LK Metro (which runs between Soi Buakao and Soi Diana Inn) in Pattaya. Full information can be obtained from the golf organiser and new owner of “The Travellers Rest” - Fergus Brennan on 086 956 7019. All other arrangements are as before.
Tuesday, August 7, Crystal Bay - White Tees, Stableford
1st Michael Brett (18) 42pts
2nd Donald Pearson (33) 39pts
3rd Ito Akitoshi (10) 38pts
4th Ray Trembath (14) 35pts c/b
5th Bernie Seagrave (12) 35pts c/b
6th John McKissock (20) 35pts
Near Pins: R. Trembath, (2) Fergus Brennan, Patrick Russell
2’s: Rollover
Tuesday found us at Crystal Bay playing on C & A courses. This was to be a Michael Brett day with 42 points and a clear 3-point win of over Donald Pearson on 39 points and Ito Akitoshi taking third spot on 38 points. Three people shared the near pins but no one had a ‘2’ so this was carried over to the Thursday outing at Bangpra.
Thursday, August 9, Bangpra, Stableford
1st Tewin Lamthong (16) 42pts
2nd Mod Chiraksa (24) 37pts
3rd Mashi Kaneta (12) 36pts
4th Ray Trembath (14) 35pts c/b
5th Alan Evans (27) 35pts c/b
6th Patrick Poussier (25) 35pts c/b
7th Tom Herrington (17) 35pts
Near Pins: Alain Taddai (2), John Beck (2)
2’s: John Beck (2), Michael Brett

Saturday’s prize winners: (Back L-R) Joe Kubon, Ray Trembath, Alun Webber, (Front L-R) Harvey Samuel, Amphan North, David Thomas.

Bangpra on Thursday was to be another ladies day. “Tigress” Tewin was back in the thick of things and scored a classy net 66 and 42 points for the win. Mod Chiraksa was 5 back on 37 points for second spot and holding up the male end of things was Mashi Kaneta in third on 36 points.
I am always looking for a tale or two for my report. This week’s is a little unusual. Bangpra has been known for the odd monkey coming and picking up a ball or two, but the last thing that Mod Chiraksa was expecting at the ninth hole was a dog coming on to the course and running off with her ball. She had been scoring very well up to this point with 21 points on the front nine but this occurrence affected her game and she only managed to scramble a further 16 points on the back nine, leaving the door open for Tewin to win.
The carried over 2’s pot was shared by John Beck (2) and Michael Brett.
Saturday, August 11, Greenwood – White Tees, Medal & Stableford
A Flight (0-16) Medal
1st Ray Trembath (14) net 64
2nd Amphan North (16) net 72 c/b
3rd David Thomas (8) net 72 c/b
4th Fergus Brennan (10) net 72 c/b
B Flight (17-up) Stableford
1st Harvey Samuel (20) 40pts
2nd Alun Webber (25) 36pts
3rd Joe Kubon (28) 35pts
4th Bob Short (22) 34pts
Near Pins: David Thomas, Joe Kubon, Bob Short (2)
2’s: Davis Thomas (2) Amphan North
A good turn out on Saturday and two flights playing the A and B courses. Flight A played medal and Flight B stableford.
A Flight saw Ray Trembath round off his week with a win after placing 4th on both Tuesday and Thursday. It was a day Ray will never forget as he shot his best ever game in Thailand for a net 64 and a clear 8 shots in front of the next three players. These all had net 72’s and had to be separated on count back with Amphan North taking second and Davis Thomas third.
In the B Flight, Harvey Samuel was the victor with 40 points, with Alun Webber on 36 points in second spot and Joe Kubon on 35 points in third.
Ray Trembath promptly rang the bell on his return for the presentation. Thanks and Congratulations Ray.
As always all the organisers and golfers would like to thank for the final time the Bowling Green staff and management for their services at the club.
Reminder - If anyone is interested in golfing with the “Travellers Rest” we play every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. We meet at 7:45am for breakfast and transportation and new players are always made to feel welcome. Just call Tewin on 086 056 7019 for further information.

Monsieur Pierre is ‘Tres Magnifique’

IPGC golf from Lewiinski’s

Sunday, August 5, Green Valley – White Tees, Stableford
A Flight
1st Don Lehmer (13) 42pts
2nd Nick Strasshine (5) 40pts
3rd Steve Mascari (6) 39pts
B Flight
1st Bob Lindborg (13) 41pts
2nd Frank Pilkington (17) 40pts
3rd Mick Shrosbree (14) 39pts
C Flight
1st Pierre Bietry (21) 39pts
2nd Barry Chadbourn (20) 38pts
3rd Fred Theobald (25) 36pts
Near Pins: #2: Vic Hester; #9: Vic Hester, #12: Pierre Bietry; #16: Barry Chadbourn
2’s: Nick Strasshine, Vic Hester, Brian Holden, Terry Phur, An Kaesavane, Noy Pimmoen, Barry Chadbourn, Yui Duangkaew
The Lady’s Man was MoM with an A Flight winning 42 points. That left Nicky Strasshine two in arrears and the count back prone duet of The President and The Inflictor but one more. As is the tradition in this hierarchical society, The President won the count back
In B Flight the Guru edged The Pilk by a single one, with Mick, Esq. capturing the bronze.
Our title homme (this week’s article ought to receive a lot of play in Quebec, given its bi-lingual bent), had the first of his two podiums on the week with a junior flight winning 39 points. The Chad was only a favorable swing away from the top spot, while Uncle Fred was two more adrift.
Tuesday, August 7, Laem Chabang A & C – White Tees, Stableford
1st Barry Copestake (16) 42pts
2nd Terry Wagner (18) 38pts
3rd Pierre Bietry (19) 36pts
4th Vic Hester (13) 35pts
2’s: Barry Copestake (2)
While Baz’s 42 point were quite notable, the paucity of 2’s, save his pair, was the story of the day. Honolulu Wags took second on the four-place, single flight day. Our Title Frog was third with 36 points, whilst The Inflictor was a pleasantly surprised paid fourth.
Wednesday, August 8, Treasure Hill – White Tees, Stableford
1st Steve Mascari (6) 32pts
2nd Brian WIlkinson (13) 31pts
2’s: None
Not many players wished to test their luck on this luckiest of Chinese days, the eighth day of the eighth month. That was fine with The President as his 32 points showed the way to the top spot. Wireless tabbed the second place loot, although he explained it could have been better.
Friday, August 10, Green Valley – White Tees, Stableford
A Flight
1st Ray Dell (12) 36pts
2nd Rick Zanoni (11) 34pts
B Flight
1st Yui Duangkaew (15) 35pts
2nd Barry Copestake (21) 34pts
2’s: Ray Dell, Barry Copestake, Mike Craighead, Pierre Bietry, Christer Olsson (2)
The “Farmer in the” took the MoM honors and first in A Flight with an even to handicap 36 point effort. That was two clear of Zamboni Zanoni.
Ms. Bietry topped B flight with her 35 points, one ahead of the Baz. B Flight’s Christer Olsson notched up two 2’s in his maiden foray of this vacation.

Morris & Postec on top at Khao Kheow

Jomtien Golf with the I.P.G.C.

Monday, August 6, Khao Kheow, Stableford
A surprisingly quick and trouble free drive up route 7 to this popular course, but after a few holes there were a few murmurings regarding the condition of the course, which is very unusual here.
The simple answer is it might have been to do with the wet weather over the previous few days that could have prevented any maintenance work. We will be watching closely over the next few weeks to see if things improve or deteriorate further.
Only 18 players out today and with no 2’s there will be a quadruple rollover in div. 2 to Treasure Hill on Wednesday. Mikael Andersson and Les Hall were the only winners in the ‘nearest the pin’ competition, so the kitty builds up for our next extravaganza day.
There was similar scoring in both divisions for the stableford game with Jack Hinchey finishing second in the lower tier with 32pts and Alain Postec going one point better in first. In division one, Ted Morris beat Mikael on a 15/13 count back after both had finished on 32 points.
The ladies tipple was outstandingly won by Dannie Larsen, playing off 17, for losing ten balls on the front nine, and then one more on the tenth before walking back to the clubhouse in disgust.
Wednesday, August 8, Treasure Hill,
Stableford
Our first visit here in many months and we found the course to be in good condition but with still no water hazard posts, so the discussions regarding where to drop still continued amongst the lads and lasses.
Again there were no 2’s payouts in either division so a mega-rollover carries forward to Burapha, Wednesday, Aug. 15. Nick Hearn and Ted Morris won the division one ‘nearest the pin’ prizes, and William Chang took the only bottle in division two.
In the stableford competition, as always here at Treasure Hill, both divisions failed to break 36-point level-par score for this course. Ben Findon’s 33pts just beat Ted Morris’s 32 in division one and in the second flight, Lee Roy Huntingdon on 32pts easily beat Jim Lane by 5 points to win.
Friday, August 10, Plutaluang,
Stableford
We switched to the naval course today for our no-frills stableford competition owing to the current poor condition of Eastern Star.
Tony Sawyer’s 33 points just beat Miss Nom on a 17/16 count back while Les Hall’s 31 points also beat Dave Ross on count back for third.
Jomtien Golf meets every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at Paweenas in Soi 5 Jomtien Beach Rd. for a 10am tee off time. Transport is available so please sign up in the bar or call Glyn on 086 837 5464.

The Square Ring: by Howie Reed

Boy the things you learn while searching the web: “Thai police officers who break rules will be forced to wear hot pink armbands featuring ‘Hello Kitty’, the Japanese icon of cute, as a mark of shame”, a senior Thai officer said recently.
Maybe that will catch on around the world. If so The Square Ring would nominate the police of the ‘Peoples Republic’ of Brazil after they deported Cuban amateur boxers, Guillermo Rigondeaux and Erislandy Lara, back to their home country. The two, with the help of German promoter Ahem Oner, had defected from the Pan Am games held in Brazil. News reports had them waiting for German visas in a secret location in the South American country. Not too secret it seems.
When the two fighters ended up on the toe of the Brazilian police boot, promoter Oner said, “Of course, that’s not good news at all, but I am not very shocked. After all the fuss Fidel Castro has made about the whole thing there was always a chance of something like that happening. I just hope that those guys get treated fair and that Fidel stops persecuting their friends and families in Cuba. We are in contact with the Brazilian administration. Maybe there is still a chance for Rigondeaux and Lara to come to Hamburg.”
As American comedian Ron White says, “You can’t fix stupid.”
After the two boxers’ families had been “delayed in living”, the two boxers apparently changed their minds, choosing Cuba over a lucrative pro-boxing career in Germany. They told police, “We want to go home.”
El Commande’ Fidel was quoted as saying, “They will be given decent tasks in sports according to their knowledge and experience.” Tote that barge, lift that bail, try for freedom and do a lot of time in a Castro jail.
The Cuban dictator did hit the nail on the head however with his description of boxing promoters as “mafia sharks lurking about in search of fresh meat.” He also said, “Cuba will not sacrifice one bit of honor, nor any of its ideas, for Olympic gold medals.”
Boy, didn’t take him long to get back to the old Cuban BS. As many ex-pat Cubans would say, “Honor? He got no honor.”
Cuba may bypass both the world championships in Chicago and other Olympic qualifying events. Boo Hoo! The armbands for the Brazilian police with the words, “El Grande Pussy” are on order.
How about an armband for Top Rank’s Bob Arum? Erik Morales went out like the champion he was when he lost a unanimous decision (115-113, 115-112, 114-113) to WBC Lightweight champion David Diaz (33-1). Morales built an early lead only to have Diaz come back aggressively. Add that to “father time” and Diaz was able to chalk up the “W”.
Those familiar with Morales didn’t expect nor did they get a graceful exit.
“Diaz is a dirty fighter”, said Morales afterwards. When he does the same kind of thing however, he and his fans call it “being professional and tying to win.” Kind of depends on whose “ox is getting gored.”
Days following the fight Morales retired as a three-time champion, a great fighter but maybe an even better whiner.
“Buffalo” Bob Arum gets the “Kitty” armband by not allowing this Morales farewell fight to be on ‘almost free’ TV. The in house crowd of 9,735 and a PPV crowd that so far has not been announced (which means that it went in the dumper) were the only ones to see the Morales swansong. Wear the armband with pride Mr. Arum.
Good thing that they make the armbands in XXL cause soon to be former WBA heavyweight champion Ruslan Chagaev will need one. To the sound of blaring trumpets and nymph like children tossing rose petals, it was announced that the world title collision between WBO heavyweight champion Sultan Ibragimov and WBA heavyweight champion Ruslan Chagaev would draw more than 14,000 boxing fans to the Ice Palace on Khodynskoye Pole in Moscow.
Stretching the truth a bit it was written, “For the first time a heavyweight unification bout will take place outside the United States.” That’s for those that believe it’s important that the WBA and WBO unify the title.
Now, due to a continuing “gastric” illness, Chagaev is out and in has stepped Evander ‘The Real Deal’ Holyfield. No suck and jive - it’s on for October 13.
Meanwhile former WBC featherweight champ Injin Chi of Korea has done a ‘Johnny Paycheck’ of “Take this job and shove it” fame. Through Major Lee Wonbok of the Korean Boxing Commission, an official letter was sent to WBC president Jose Sulaiman renouncing the title. That now promotes Jorge Linares, who defeated Oscar Larios via an impressive tenth round stoppage, up to WBC featherweight champ.
What will Chi do now? Either fight at 130lbs or move into MMA (Mixed Martial Arts).
“Your Lordship, being the expert on all things boxing that you are, I am in a quandary.”
I’m sure I can answer any questions you might have Jeeves.
“Well, Your Lordship, the WBC president Dr. Jose; Sulaiman has released to the press the opinion that a third Vazquez-Marquez fight should be in Mexico. He is quoted, ‘I have taken as my purpose to bring the third fight to Mexico City since this battle belongs to this boxing country, and it will undoubtedly be a sellout wherever it takes place. Both boxers have been ordered a mandatory resting period, without any contact, of 60 days. Meanwhile, the final elimination fight will be taking place in Thailand, and the winner of such fight will be designated official challenger in the WBC super bantamweight division.’
“Your Lordship, on September 20 at the Bangplama School in Suphan Buri, Napapol Kiatisakchokai (42-2) and Saenghiran Lookbanyai (20-0) will meet in the WBC super bantam title eliminator. The question is Your Lordship, who is the winner of the title eliminator going to fight?”
Well Jeeves, as the Hillbilly once said when stopped by the Highway Patrolman and asked if he had an ID, “An ID officer? An ID about what?”
In news from the Land of Oz, the WBA super middleweight champion Anthony Mundine may have to retire from boxing. He has been hospitalized with a severe eye infection caused when he used his mouth to clean a contact lens before inserting it in his eye. Doctors now say it could take weeks or months for the natural healing process to take place and there is also the chance that he’ll loose sight in the eye.
Many said Mundines “foul, hate spewing mouth” would eventually get him into trouble. Spot on!
“Your Lordship, you got an e-mail from cousin Bruce McTavish, world famous boxing judge/referee, taking you to task. He opines, ‘It would be remiss of me not to mention the following as the first World Cup (of boxing) was Thailand against Mexico and there are six fights, not seven.’
“What do you say to that Your Lordship?”
Well Jeeves he’s right about the first World Cup being between Thailand and Mexico. The second World Cup held last Sunday in Sacramento, California between Mexico and the Philippines was supposed to be over 7 matches, but after ‘The Square Ring’ went to press last week, the Bert Batawang (50-6) vs. Gerardo Verde (15-4) fight was cancelled. Verde failed the eye examine. Now, had the World Cup of Boxing ended in a tie at three a side then Pacquiao-Barrera would have been the tiebreaker. It didn’t, so it isn’t.
The second World Cup of boxing turned into a route for the Mexican boxers as they lost the first four bouts at the Arco Arena. It looked for a while that maybe Mexico would take the fifth bout when the WBO bantam champ Jhonny Gonzales built an early lead over old warhorse Gerry Penalosa.
One of the raps on Gonzales, besides the fact that he misspelled his first name, is that he sometimes seems to be doing less than necessary. Unlike most Mexican fighters he often lacks the “fire”. Sunday at Arco was a perfect example as he was doing as little as possible to win and allowed Penalosa to hang around and he got knocked out at 2:45 of the 7th round with a shot to the ‘Hannibal Lector.’ “Yes Clarice, I ate the liver with fava beans and a nice Chianti.”
This is Penalosa’s first world title since he won the WBC super fly title more than 10 years ago.
The evening festivities came to a crashing end and Mexican pride was somewhat restored when WBO junior feather champ, Daniel Ponce De Leon (32-1), destroyed Rey Bautista and his perfect 23-0 record at 2:30 of the first round. A hard left hand initially sent Bautista to the canvas. He beat the count but was still wobbly when De Leon pounced to brutally apply the “Cup of Grace.”
“Your Lordship, the ‘King of Second Road’ Dave Stewart (20-1) gets a shot at the British lightweight title on October 5 against Jonathan Thaxton (32-7). Thaxton appears to have more power but I’ll bet he can’t match the heart of the ‘Dapper One’.
“Meanwhile Your Lordship, I’ve heard that many of our readers in the Kingdom play “Whack...Darn.... Shoot” on a regular basis. Whilst having a few cold ones the other night and viewing some classic dance, the lads were bemoaning the fact that their ‘companions’ never join them for a little ‘cow pasture pool.’ I suggested they teach them the game Your Lordship and even gave them a foolproof way for giving lessons.”
Foolproof? And what would that be Jeeves?
“Well Your Lordship, you start by teaching them about the putter, then go to the irons and then you get them into the woods.”
Jeeves, the lagers and cigars please!

Tom McCarthy goes out in style

IPGC golf from The OK Corral

Sunday, August 5, and Plutaluang N/W was the venue for the OK Corral’s Sunday Stableford. The early light breeze died away and the conditions were hot and humid for most of the round.
Only a small field of eight players attended, despite a rollover 2’s pot and near pin prizes for the par 3’s.
Erik Anttonen and Larry Slattery shared joint runner-up on 33 points each, and Tom McCarthy coasted into first with level par 36 points off his newly reduced handicap. A fine departure gift for Tom as it was his final round of golf in Pattaya for several months.
The 2’s pot was split three ways between Erik Antonnen, Tom, and Philip Moore.
Another impending departure was John Rehm, but to him went the Booby Bevy award for missing his 3-foot birdie putt on West 8 that would have given him a share in the 2’s pot.
Paul Quodomine, celebrating his birthday, presented near pin gift certificates of 500 baht redeemable at Pattaya City Golf for near pins on N3, N6, W3, and W8. They went to Larry Slattery, who won a coin toss from Erik Antonnen for equal distances on N3, Phil Moore on N6, Tom McCarthy on W3, and John Rehm on W8.
A tie at the top at Phoenix
Tuesday, August 7 was a medal round on the Phoenix Mountain and Lake nines. The course was in fine condition as it has been of late, but the sanded greens were a bit slower than usual.
This being the low season there was again a very light turnout. Sharing first place were Joop Medze and Philip Moore who each scored net 71, and in third and one stroke back was Peter Masters.
There were no 2’s for the day and the pot was rolled over. The Booby Bevy was awarded to Paul Quodomine whose score was dismal but he exclaimed, “At least I can now draw the ball!” Paul, you have to realign when you hit a draw!
Wind beats all at Mountain Shadow
The OK Corral took a small group of eleven to Mountain Shadow for its Thursday stableford competition. Played off the blue tees, the course was well presented with the front nine greens nearly recovered from recent coring.
This course, with its large raised greens, undulating, and quick, is a true test at the best of times. Today however, it was to prove the ultimate challenge as the wind was particularly strong.
Some holes such as the par three 15th, playing into the full force of the gale over water, required a four club adjustment. It proved very difficult for players to force themselves to adjust accordingly. The previous hole, also into the gale, the par 5, 14th (stroke hole two) the one that winds itself around that bloody lake, surrendered no pars. So it was no surprise that scores were low.
The one division competition offered just three podium positions and scores were tight. Sharing second equal place were Gilles Akoum playing off a 32 handicap, and Peter Masters (16), who both returned 31 points. Peter’s effort, given the conditions and his activities of the previous night, was indeed meritorious (if his story is to be believed).
Winning the day’s competition, playing off 6, was David Thomas. He needed a fortuitous birdie on the last to just squeeze in with 32 points.
The booby bevy award was, after some discussion, awarded to David Thomas. Having hit his “shot of the day” to the back pin on 15, he then proceeded to miss an 18-inch putt. This miss cost him what would have been the only ‘2’ of the day, which when combined with the rollover from the previous outing cost him about 950 baht. Ouch!!

The Whippersnapper comes good

IPGC golf from The Haven

Monday, August 6, Bangpra, Stableford
1st Barry Traynor 42pts
2nd Brian Kelly 40pts
3rd Phil Groves 37pts c/b
4th Chris Knapp 37pts
5th Graham Davis 36pts
It was to be a high scoring week for all the winners, on difficult courses made even more so by the recent weather conditions that left everything sodden. It all kicked off at Bangpra on Monday where the greens were thankfully not as quick as usual to make up for the lack of run generally.
Barry Traynor continued with his excellent form, which now sees him as a shoe-in at No. 2 in ‘The Pot Hunters’ scramble team, and with a return of six-under par he must have been surprised that anyone got near to him. Certainly not as close as Brian Kelly, who is undergoing some special blood treatment in Bangkok once a week which may have to be looked at more closely if his current form continues to belie his recent performances.
Phil Groves made a welcome return to play out of the Haven with a steady one-under to secure third spot ahead of Chris Knapp on count back.
Graham Davis filled out the fifth rung of the ladder with a par matching score prior to his impending return to the glens.
There were no 2’s in the first division but Alan Duckett had the only one in the second division to sweep the pot.
Before presenting the prizes The Doc welcomed new member Ross Treacy and welcomed back Tony Quaid, Russell Exley and Mike Dabanovich.
Wednesday, August 8, Greenwood,
Stableford
1st John Murphy 41pts
2nd Walt Straub 40pts
3rd Doug Maiko 39pts
4th Russell Exley 38pts
5th Mark Woods 36pts
John Murphy, having been awarded the longest drive accolade following his drive from up from Phuket just the day before, showed why he is now a serious candidate for a handicap cut with a five-under return that just pipped Walt Straub by a shot. Walt has been playing almost seven days a week as he endeavours to wring the most out of a recently purchased yearly membership at one of the local clubs and the practice is obviously paying dividends.
Doug Maiko also slipped straight into winning ways as he made his first appearance at The Haven for some while. Russell Exley was just a further shot back but one ahead of Mark Woods, who is at last showing why he is so well thought of back in his home club in Sydney, unfortunately only just prior to his latest scheduled return.
Surprisingly with such good scores on the day there were no 2’s in either division.
Back at The Haven, John Murphy and Doug Maiko were welcomed back prior to the presentations.
Friday, August 10, Green Valley, Stableford
1st Russell Exley 40pts
2nd Barry Winton 37pts c/b
3rd Rick Holmes 37pts
4th Tony Barritt 33pts c/b
5th Frank Pilkington 33pts
6th Trevor Schirmer 32pts
Russell Exley, known locally as the Whippersnapper, is at last making a positive move up the handicap rankings after a prolonged hiatus stuck on 16. His latest achievements during the current week will surely see him down to 14 which will be rewarded by a hefty donation from one of his greatest admirers and patrons. A fair reward for so much effort both on the range and at any and all competitions and it cannot be long before he will be gracing the single handicappers table at the post match celebrations and perhaps even giving the odd lesson to a few of his old playing buddies on their return.
Barry Winton showed why he is frequently to be found near or at the top of the podium with a splendid gross 35 on the back nine following what for him was a somewhat lower quality outward half. This proved to be the difference as he took second ahead of Rick Holmes by count back after Rick had produced an excellent front half made when the conditions were at their worst.
Tony Barritt slid into fourth place, also by count back, over Frank Pilkington, and Trevor Schirmer at last got a mention as some recompense for all his hard work organizing the groups at the courses.
Once again there were no 2’s in the second division but Barry Winton slipped in two on the back nine to claim a huge first division pot that included several carry-overs.
Prior to the prize giving The Doc welcomed new members Chris Clerk, Tony Crocetta, Peter Koha and David Harris. There were also several welcomes on the night to new members the Black Hand Club following the repainting of the toilet doors. There was also a provisional bye-bye to Mark Woods that nobody actually believed after so many false alarms over the past two months, but at press time it seemed that it could at last be true and that the trains in-between Wollongong and Sydney will be back to normal.
An Apology: Following several enquiries from past commanding officers and many old serving comrades, together with a few from local members of the British Legion, an apology must be made for a slight misunderstanding arising from last weeks report in which Rick Holmes was referred to as CSM. This was intended to be a shortened version of “Colour Syndrome Myopia”, in relation to his recent dress code, but due to space restrictions the additional copy had to be truncated.
Rick is in fact known throughout Pattaya and in all European dog-loving circles as a Regimental Sergeant Major (RSM), which was indeed his rank when he left Her Majesty’s Armed Forces. We trust that this published public apology will atone for any ill feeling that may have been generated and that there will now be no need for recourse to the law.

Helgasson and Perrin take a shine to Greenwood

PSC golf from The Café Kronborg

Monday, August 6, Treasure Hill, Stableford
The Treasure Hill Country Club was host to a stableford competition in one flight. The course was in good shape, with the exception of the Bunkers, but we got around that by playing ‘winter rules’ in the bunkers.

Kris Helgasson: winner of the A Flight at Greenwood.
Guenson Yoon beat everybody with 38 points, Per Baarli was in second with 35 points, Henry O’Brien was in third with 33 points and Doug Maiko was fourth with 32 points on count back over Kris Helgasson, Mike Winfield and Dave Richardson.
Thursday, August 9, Greenwood, Stableford
So off we went to what is probably the best value golf course of the lot. Even with a good turnout we were swiftly booked in and straight to the first Tee to play the A & B layouts. Of course the wind was blowing, as it usually does this time of the year, but you cannot have everything.
Both ‘nines’ were in fine condition, with maybe the greens a little slow, but all in all we made good progress and were soon back in the clubhouse.
Up the stairs is the restaurant, and we had ‘The Deal’ with a meal thrown into the price, and I did not hear one complaint about the quality of the food, and the boys here know how to complain.
So who won and what were the scores like? Well the scores were good without being outstanding, which is how we like them to be as it proves the handicap system works. In the A Flight (0-18), the winner was Kris Helgasson with 39 points ahead of a fine Gross 72 and 38 points by Marty Allred in second. In third was Walter Bachli, who birdied the last hole to score 36 points and squeeze ahead of those close behind him.
In the B Flight the scores were similar, with the winner Jay Perrin coming home with 39 points ahead of a count back for second on 36 points that was won by Graham Buckingham, with Henry O’Brien in third.
T.T.F.N.

Mick breaks his duck at Burapha

PSC golf from Tropical Berts

Tuesday, August 7, Burapha, Stableford
A strange day at Burapha as all the main contenders played super golf. The day started as normal, we all arrived early, and after booking in we climbed into carts, these being mandatory at this course, and got to the start maybe 30 minutes early. “Go ahead” they said and so off we went on the A & B Nines.

Tuesday’s winners, Mick O’Meara, Frank Pilkington and Robin Lennon pose with Pu (The boss).
The course at Burapha was in good condition, except for large areas that were dug up, and I suspect being re seeded. A bit awkward if you drove the ball in there as they were not marked as G.U.R., so you have a difficult shot. Mind the rest of the fairways were fine and most of these areas were in the rough anyway.
The greens were also in nice condition - so good scores could be the norm for the day. One great shot was witnessed when Steve Hamstad put the ball to within 2 inches of the cup with his tee shot on B3.
We got around pretty fast, there being very few people on the course, and the only problem was a fairly stiff wind that at times carried a spot of rain.
Sat in the club restaurant as the cards came in, it was obvious that the scores were going to be good. Chris Youngman came in with 39 points, his best round for some time, but Derek Brook knocked him back into second early on, with a fine 40 points. But would they hold on?
Back at Bert’s all the principal actors were waiting for the scribe to return and tell them the winners, however he took a detour and made them wait. So did the early leaders hang on? Well, not by a long shot. The winner, who played in the last group, was Mick O’Meara with a great 43 points. This is Mick’s first win and after playing regularly he was probably overdue. In second was Frank Pilkington with 41 points on count back over Robin Lennon in third. Robin started off like an express train and shot a Gross 33 (24 points) on the front Nine. When you realise how well you are playing, the brain sometimes goes. Maybe next time Robin.
T.T.F.N.
Near Pin: Steve Hamstad, Frank Pilkington, Dick Warburg (2)
Long Put: Steve Hamstad, Arthur Bailey

Pattaya Sports Club Friday Bowling League

Results & Standings Aug. 10 (week 16)

200 Bowlers: Rich, Maliny, Kran, Bill Gibson & Bill Key

Good bowling by all three bowlers for the Mai’s Thai Restaurant team gave them a four point sweep over Three Sisters and they jumped into first place. Bill Gibson bowled games of 213, 163, 214, 590 series, Wade had a 544 series and Leo a 500 for Mai’s Thai Restaurant.
Brother D remains in second place as they split their match with Jack & Tar with each team getting two points.
The battle of the first placed and last placed teams saw Diamond Shop take three points from Café Kronborg and knock them out of first place. Nual bowled a 531 series and Dang added a 524 for Diamond Shop. Kran rolled a 215 game and 551 series for Café Kronborg.
Bill Key led Beaver Bar & Grill to a three point win over Café Ole with a 585 series and Beaver moved up to fourth. Rich Montana had a 577 series for Café Ole. Barry had a 545 series and Maliny got a 214 game and 538 series to lead Montana to a three-point win over VFW Post 9876.