Equal opportunities

What an absolutely fantastic week of football we’ve had. I know I’m the first to start muttering when things aren’t so fantastic, but if I’m honest some of last week’s action left me open-mouthed. You can stick your Rugby World Cup, even if for once the egg-chasers are making their World Cup slightly unpredictable for a change.
Talking of World Cups, it’s a hearty congratulations to Germany for retaining the World Cup last week - the women’s version, of course.
German men’s teams are known for their efficiency and it should come as no surprise to discover that their frauleins are cut from the same cloth. Their functional if uninspiring 2-0 win over the ladies from Brazil in Shanghai makes them the first nation to retain the Women’s World Cup, and whilst we’re talking about records it’s worth noting the side’s 600 minutes without conceding a goal. That’s impressive stuff, and will only mean that the tournament will now finally start to the get the recognition it deserves as a serious competition. For birds.
Meanwhile over in another World Cup final last week - the gay version this time - British side Stonewall FC’s bid to retain their version of the trophy was undone as the Argentinean team Los Dogos beat the reigning champions 1-0 in Buenos Aires’ Defensores de Belgrano stadium. It was the first time an Argentinean side had even competed in the tournament, and other debutants included Latino nations such as Uruguay, Chile, and Mexico. Hooray! I can think of a few possible crowd chants in that one - how about ‘Do you take it...” (We get the point Riz - Sports Ed)
So anyway that’s the obscure side of the game covered. The main thrust of this week’s “Beautiful Game?” is yet more staggering news to come from Scotland.
Not happy with their national side beating France at home and away to top their group (no doubt they’ll get turned over by the Ukraine tomorrow), their club sides are getting in on the act as well. Celtic overcame European Champions AC Milan by two goals to one last Thursday - more on that in a moment - but the real stunner was Rangers’ 3-0 thumping of French champions Lyon on their own turf the previous evening. It was an absolutely amazing result, and perhaps proof that Scottish football is looking healthier than at any time in recent years.
“We have showed we can compete at this level in two games but we’ve got to take it to the next level against Barcelona [in the next game] - it’ll be an extremely tough task,” said a delighted Walter Smith.
Indeed it will. For Celtic it was an evening of mixed emotions. Their enormously impressive home form in the Champions League - only Barcelona have managed to win at Celtic Park - was once again the key as the Bhoys turned over the might of Milan to set themselves up for a serious chance of escaping the group stages. Yet what should have been an historic night for the green and white was marred after a fan clambered over the hoardings and ‘attacked’ Milan’s goalkeeper, Dida, as Celtic celebrated their second and decisive goal.
I put ‘attacked’ in inverted commas because that was hardly what it was. The fan merely stroked the Brazilian’s cheek in a playful manner as he sprinted across the penalty area. Dida then took chase before realising the potential of the situation and fell down clutching his face. A few minutes of extensive medical treatment later Dida was carried off the pitch on a stretcher.
Dida was playing the clever card, realising that the result might be overturned if Celtic were convicted of failing to keep their fans under control. Let’s not forget that the same player was hit on the head by a flare in a Milan derby two years ago that led to the match being abandoned and his side AC Milan handed a 3-0 victory. No doubt the Brazilian realised this as he began to give chase to the drunken fan and he decided, slowly and embarrassingly, to go down as if he’d just been struck by a surface-to-air missile.
If Celtic are to be penalised for the incident we can only hope it’s a financial cost rather than points, as to lose the result due to the behaviour of one individual would be a catastrophe. Whilst you cannot condone fans entering the field and making contact with players, this incident was meant in jest and there’ll be a few prayers in Glasgow to the gods of UEFA in the coming weeks.
Even the Italian press were quick to put Dida down. Under a headline that read, “Didastro: Milan on the floor with Dida”, the sports newspaper Gazzetto Dello Sport said: “Slapped by a supporter after the decisive goal in the last minute, the giant Dida is left floored as if he had been struck by Tyson and leaves on a stretcher. Can the Milan keeper do anything right? First he gifts the winning goal, then he can’t even catch the cheeky kid who slapped him. It was a symbolic image of a disgraceful night. Dida’s play-acting was the latest sadness for Milan.”
Moving onto the Premier League and it was quite a weekend in England. My request for goals was answered, and in some style as several games over the past week saw four or more goals fly in. Long live poor defending!
Internationals take over this week with a few notable fixtures being that Scotland game against the Ukraine at Hampden, England’s must-win home match against Estonia, Holland away in Romania and Belgium versus Finland. But let’s be honest, you’re not going to watch any of the ones that don’t feature your team, so it’s best to leave it there. Enjoy.
What do we want? Austria out! When do we want it? 2008!
Thousands of Austrian football fans dismayed at their national side’s poor showing ahead of co-hosting Euro 2008 are petitioning for their team to be withdrawn from the tournament.
A group of fans have collected more than 4,000 names on their website since launching the petition last Wednesday.
“This is not about criticising players or coaches,” said Michael Kriess, one of the four fans who launched the petition. “We simply say that the way Austria is playing is an insult to ours and every fan’s aesthetic understanding of the game.”
Earlier this month, Austria extended their winless run to eight by losing 2-0 to Chile in a home game. The team play co-hosts Switzerland in a friendly on October 13. According to the petitioners, displays of skill by coach Josef Hickersberger’s squad were as rare as meteors landing on Earth.
“It means you fall into a dismal state of depression when watching a match featuring the Austrian national football team,” said the miserable bunch. They blame the team’s management for the problems and have even resorted to selling t-shirts with the catchy slogan: “Initiative for an Austria-free Euro 08 supporter” emblazoned across them. The proceeds will go towards an Austrian academy for football officials.

Evans goes low in Monthly Medal

Jomtien golf with the I.P.G.C.

Monday, October 1, Green Valley, Stableford
We had our maximum field of 36 players out today at this ever-popular course. With the greens still very fast and slick the predictions on the first tee were that anybody with 34/35 points in either division should be on the winners rostrum.
This score was surpassed in Division 1 with Tom Sathrum winning the day with 38 points, in-form Chris Holmes was second with 35 points, and Bill Hewitt came third two points further back.
The old man Ken Foster with 34 points won the Division 2 battle, closely followed Les Winch and Douglas Carysforth on 32 points, with Dougie losing out on a 19/14 count back to Les.
In the 2’s competition today there was one rollover in Division 1 and two rollovers in Division 2. Tom Sathrum got the only birdie in the first division while Alan Bissell, George Meigh and Dannie Larsen shared the three-game pot in the second.
Nearest the pins today were claimed by Chris Holmes (2), Mikael Andersson and Ted Morris in Division 1 and Alan Bissell, Dannie Larsen, George Meigh and Andy Oz in the second tier. There was some humorous barracking back at the bar when the last group of Alan, Chris, Dannie and Eddie all won nearest the pin prizes … hmmm.
The ladies tipple was won by a certain person who had scored 13 points after 4 holes, this was applauded by the organiser, but in the next six holes he scored only one point. Well done Joe Kubon.
Wednesday, October 3, Greenwood, Monthly Medal
The first Wednesday of the month and as normal our only medal competition.
Playing the A and B courses at Greenwood it proved a good test for the players on the day but with the white tees well forward some good scores were expected.
Two net 68’s shared second and third position in Division 1 with Dave Richards beating Paddy Wilson on a better back nine. Meanwhile Bill Hewitt’s net 66 took first place.
Slightly better scores were seen in the lower division with Joe Kubon’s net 67 coming in third, one shot less was Jim Lane with net 66, and winning the division with net 64 was Glyn Evans.
Ted Morris’s birdie on A6 was the only ‘2’ in Division 1 and their were no 2’s in Division 2 so a rollover goes to Plutaluang next Monday. Ted and Paddy Wilson were the only winners in the nearest the pin contest in Division 1 while in Division 2 Les Hall was smiling with two wins and Jack Hinchey with one.
Thursday 4th & Friday 5th October, Royal Hills, Stableford
Seventeen of us arrived at the Royal Hills for a two-day stableford competition.
Set amongst the hills and mountains in Nakhon Nayok this course from the hotel balcony looked stunning, and it proved to be exactly that.
Dave Richard’s 35 points beat Andy Shelley on count back to take first place on the Thursday, with Paddy Wilson’s 30 points in third and Paul Quodomine with 28 in fourth. Paul’s 30 points on the Friday earned him first place closely followed by Jack Hinchey on 29 points, who beat Paddy Wilson on count back.
On the first day there were an amazing four birdie 2’s shared by Glyn Evans, Dave Richards, Andy Oz and Paddy Wilson. On the second day Glyn Evans had two and Andy Oz had one.
Note: Jomtien Golf meets every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at Paweenas bar Soi 5 Jomtien Beach Rd around 8.30 for a 10.00am tee off. Please sign up in the bar or call Glyn on 086 837 5464.

O’Neil shows good form at Pattaya Country Club

PSC golf from The Outback Golf Bar

Wednesday’s winners gather after the outing to Pattaya Country Club.

Monday, October 1, Eastern Star, Stableford
A Flight
1st Phil Smith 39pts
2nd Jim Wickstrom 38pts
3rd Chris Davisson 35pts
B Flight
1st Barry Rothberg 33pts
2nd Paul Crossland 32pts
3rd Sugar Ray 28pts c/b
2’s: Chris Davisson, Jack Moseley and Jim Wickstrom.
In spite of some bad rumours we found the course to be in great condition and it provided, as always, a tough test with only a few players able to break the 30-point barrier.
Twenty-two Outbackers began the day but not all returned. Several of our number got mysteriously lost in the Bang Chang area, which is unusual for Outbackers as they normally display an acute sense of direction.
Indeed, so light were the returning numbers that the Hat went to Pete Milson who had absolutely nothing to do with the golf but just happened to drop in for a beer.
Wednesday, October 3, Pattaya C.C., Stableford
A Flight
1st Jack Moseley 41pts
2nd Phil Smith 38pts
3rd Steve Morton 37pts
B Flight
1st Frank O’Neil 42pts
2nd Barry Rothberg 38pts
3rd Peter Harris 37pts
2’s: Barry Chadbourne
The last time I played here was when a keen young caddie decided to crush Jack Moseley’s beer can with her foot whilst he was in mid putt. Her action was silky smooth yet powerful enough to complete the perfect crush. Unfortunately there was still half a can of beer left inside. The volume of Singha that shot up her leg was matched only by the tears that followed - hers in embarrassment, his in fury, and mine in hysterics.
That caddy was nowhere to be seen this time but the eccentricity of this course was there in abundance on this fine day.
On the first tee it took Sugar Ray five minutes to get his tee peg into the ground, which surprised many of us who found it impossible to find any solid surface beneath the tangle of woolly grass.
It is always a pleasure to see the ball skipping in leaps and bounds, weaving left or right across the greens, what fun, and we all enjoyed the proliferation of herbaceous borders, especially the ones around the holes. Thankfully the only bunker injury was a fractured sand wedge, and at the end of the round it’s great to look forward to a refreshing cold shower.
In fairness, as the scores testify, the course did not play badly though unsurprisingly there was only one ‘2’. And it is also very convenient to most golfers.
Lastly it was nice to welcome Bryant Berry back after an absence from golf of 22 years. He thoroughly enjoyed himself and played some handsome shots which won him the Hat.
Friday, October 5, Plutaluang, Stableford
1st Bob Philp 33pts
2nd General Bunphot 33pts
3rd Rod Woodriffe 32pts
2’s: Barry Chadbourne and General Bunphot.
On a dry, clear day with a cool fresh breeze blowing through this beautiful valley, ten stout Outbackers took to the fray including our honoured guest General Bunphot, who served with Jeff McLaury in Vietnam.
The East and West loops were hosting a massive 36-hole competition so we enjoyed a brisk round amongst the hills of the North and South.
Bob Philp assured us it was an easy walk on a flat terrain. He continued to insist he was right even at the end of the round – after he’d recovered his breath.
Scoring was tough but Philp did manage a modest 33, which was enough to pip our guest on count back. Big Rod, so they tell me, came in third.
Back at the bar we enjoyed several cold ales, the first from the General who kindly rang the bell.
We also welcomed Tony Cobb who has just returned from the UK, and Dougie took the Hat with a magnificent 20 points.

Wood carries the day at Phoenix

PSC golf from The Café Kronborg

Derek Brook
Monday, October 1, The Emerald, Stableford
The very green Emerald Country Club was the site for a Stableford competition in two flights, A Flight 0 to 19 and B Flight 20 and up. The course on the day was in fine shape, but the maintenance staff were in the process of coring and sanding the greens on the front nine.

David Wood shot a fine 38 points at Phoenix to claim A Flight first place.
The ever-present Ebrahim took the A Flight on a count back from Brian Noguer in second, both with 33 points whilst Walter Bachli was in third with 30 points.
Henry O’Brien won the B Flight with 33 points, keeping up the high scoring, with P Singh Basi in second with 30 points and Big Chris Borrat beat Kevin Dinan for third on count back, both with 29 points.
With the High Season starting in a couple of weeks we have two big events at the Cafe Kronborg in the Month of November. The first being Bjarne’s Birthday Scramble on Monday, November 5 and The Ray Rogers Thanksgiving Day Texas Scramble on Thursday, November 22. Both events are at Pattaya Country Club. Feel Free, to contact Dave on 083-602-2117 if you have any questions.
Thursday, October 4, Phoenix, Stableford
With the ‘Leader’ suffering from an old ‘war wound’, Norman took over and took a large group down to Phoenix.
The course was as usual in very good condition, and we played the Mountain and Ocean combination, this is to most people the best combination.
So off we went and the wind was as usual a factor, it was not expected the scores would be great. This course is slowly getting more and more difficult and the ridiculous scores of a few years ago are a distant memory.
Back in the restaurant Norman did the presentation.
In the A Flight, 0 to 19, the winner was David Wood with a fine 38 points ahead of Walter Bachli with 37 points in second and Marty Allred with 36 points in third. It is noted that Marty shot a Gross 72; he seems like a reasonably good player.
In the B Flight, 20 up, the winner was Daryl Evans with 37 points ahead of Alan Ewing with 36 points in second, and honoring us for the day, Dick Caggiano with 35 points in third.
T.T.F.N.

Jorma’s stormer

IPGC Pattaya Golf Society at the OK Corral

Sunday, September 30, the Pattaya Golf Society left the OK Corral with a very cosmopolitan group, representing ten nationalities, all bound for Plutaluang for a single flight stableford event over the North and West nines.
The course was well presented and relatively empty but the slower than expected greens caught many by surprise. As befit the occasion, the group looked shipshape with tucked-in shirts and set about their task under a near cloudless sky.
Having overcome his back problems, Aussie Stuart Thompson returned to his golfing friends and posted a fine 31-point score on his comeback to take a share of third place with leftie Don Nellis, whose form is excellent at the moment. In second place was Kiwi David Thomas and his 33 points included only one “over fives” on the second most difficult hole, W5.
The day’s winner was the Flying Finn Jorma Liila, taking a victory for the first time in a long while, and his winning total of 34 points could have been so much better as he dropped three shots on the final hole. He later explained that the aberration was a result of the final drinks stop having no beer!
Werner Pausch joined Stuart Thompson and Don Nellis for a share of the 2’s pot and Mr. Denis chose Len Jones as the recipient of the ‘Booby Bevy’ as his football team and national rugby team had both suffered embarrassing defeats at the weekend, and his 8-19 split seemed a suitable end to the “sao-athit”.
Nothing is overlooked at the OK Corral, it seems.
Winners all Hart
October began in fine style for the Pattaya Golf Society when it chose the popular Green Valley course for its monthly curtain-raiser on Tuesday, a pairs better ball stableford event.
A dozen teams turned out all trying to outbid the others in an effort to record the first win of the month. The course was well-presented and some difficult pin placements made for a challenging day.
Scores were excellent generally and Harry Riley and Ya Chaiyanont used all their course knowledge to post an early clubhouse lead of 45 points. Later Ray Underwood and Masashi Iizumi returned with the same score but eventually it was good only for third place because the Finnish pairing of Niilo Olonen and Na Srionrod were making their mark with 46 points.
In normal circumstances this would probably have been good enough for the win but the pairing of Ian Hart and John Rehm were having the rounds of their lives. Both were individually three-under at the turn with a team score of 29 points. John Rehm then proceeded to fall off the pace alarmingly but captain Ian continued his excellent form and contributed seven best scores on the back nine to give the team a total of 50 points for a splendid four-point win. Ian’s personal score of forty points was an indication of his role in the team.
John Rehm posted the day’s only birdie ‘2’ on the testing second hole and almost scooped the pool with his nosedive on the back nine putting him in the frame for the ‘Booby Bevy’ but eventually it went to Fiz Kamruddin and Nick Cardy, who suffered under the weight of their UK handicaps and were playing in an entirely different environment at Green Valley.
If anything, the day showed that team golf is an enjoyable format and Green Valley was the perfect host.
Heady stuff from Chang
Crystal Bay gave its usual warm welcome to the Pattaya Golf Society on Thursday as they arrived to play a stableford event over the B and A nines on a fine warm day and a very well-presented course. It was an excellent opportunity for some fine golf and most of the large group obliged.
In third place, making his final appearance before returning to Japan, was Kazuki Agune and his 34 points reflected his growing confidence in his game. In second place was lady golfer Na Srionrod and her 37 points represented some strong golf indeed.
The winner was old friend Chang Suh, on his annual visit from the States, and his arrival was marked by a splendid 40 points, his gross of 73 being the best of the day. The only shot dropped was amazingly on the relatively easy B1 hole, his first hole of the day.
The other high point of the competition was the sole birdie ‘2’ registered by Stuart Thompson on B4.
The group later said goodbye to Masashi Iizumi as he was presented with the ‘Booby Bevy’ for an unparalleled display of pole dancing the evening before in Soi 3 and this led to a dismal final round. The presentation said its farewells to Kazu, Masashi and Werner Pausch who were all leaving for home, but golf life goes on in Pattaya and what a day it had been for a boy named Suh!

Nual takes it by five

PSC golf from Tropical Bert’s

Tuesday, October 2, Phoenix, Stableford
The year is flying by, it’s October already and we are into the countdown to Xmas. It won’t be long until the unfortunate are putting on their Father Xmas suits and hoping for snow. Well you can expect a lot here - but not snow.

Nual Russel and Frank Pilkington with Bert and staff.

Today we decided to play the fine course at Phoenix and were allocated the Mountain and Ocean nines. It is only a few minutes down the road, so just a nice amble down, then a quick book in and off to the first tee.
The course was as usual in fine condition and the views were superb. The fairways were in fine trim also and the greens were hard and fast.
We had a full list, and after the finish it was into the cars and back to Bert’s. At Bert’s all were waiting, so it was time for the results.
The winner with 42 points was Nual Russel, ahead of Frank Pilkington in second with 37 points and in a count back on 35 points, Bill Knight was third with Daryl Evans just missing out.
T.T.F.N.
Near Pin: Perry McNeely (2), Carole Kubicki. Frank Pilkington
Long Put: Steve Hamstad, Daryl Evans

The Square Ring: by Howie Reed

The next time someone, like the author of The Square Ring, tells you that boxing is dead, mention to them a recent fight card in Mexico. The card was on TV and consisted of 74 scheduled rounds. That be a lot of box fighting!
How good or bad was the card? One reporter wrote, “One moment, the ring was somewhat illuminated - moments later, it was dark. So followed the action.”
Well done all!
Not so well done is the fight this Friday in Aussieland. For anyone that cares, Fatai Onikeke (22-2) is the IBF jr. welterweight champion. He will defend his title against Thailand’s Somchi Nakbalee, whose 9-3 record belies the facts. He’s lost his last 3 including one in which his jaw was broken. After this loss to Onikeke, Somchi will get a November date against Ranee Ganoy for the IBF (I Be Finished) lightweight title, also in the Land of Bar B’s, Brews and Broads.
Last week it was reported that Shane Mosley had been accused of using THG before his 2003 fight with Oscar De La Hoya. He denied the report but upon further review his tune has changed. USA Today’s Chuck Jonson wrote that Shane Mosley had confirmed he “unknowingly” took banned substances, but said he truthfully testified to the mistake four years ago before the BALCO grand jury.
Responding to a recent story on Sports Illustrated’s website, Mosley issued this statement: “I’m disappointed that this is coming out again, four years after I’ve been to the grand jury and gave my truthful testimony. I even took a lie detector test back then to let everyone know that I wasn’t trying to be an unfair fighter.”
Sounds like yet another “Dog ate my homework excuse.”
If ‘The Square Ring’ asked you dear readers to name the four Filipino world boxing champions, could you get it done? Wrong from the “get-go” as Manny Pacquiao isn’t currently a world champion. True fact.
The latest to join the list is Donnie Nietes (22-1-3) who won the vacant WBO minimum-weight title with a 12-round unanimous decision (116-110, 115-111, and 114-113) over previously unbeaten Pornsawam Kratingdaenggym (21-1) of Thailand. Pornsawam gave a good account of himself but doesn’t have the foundation to be a world class fighter.
The four Filipino champs? Gerry Penalosa, Nonito Donaire, Florante Condes and now Nietes. Manny Pacquiao doesn’t hold a title but some, including his promoters are pushing him for best “pound-for-pound”. With that mantel - and 5 Baht - you can jump on and off a speeding Toyota on the Second Road.
Speaking of Second Road, the pride of same, and of Scotland, Dave Stewart, came up a little short last week in his bid for the British lightweight title. In against always-tough Jonathan Thaxton (33-7) Stewart started fast but in the end couldn’t cope with the power of the champion. A clash of heads in the 8th left Stewart bloodied and when a relentless body attack was added to the mix Stewart succumbed at 1:30 of the 12th round.
Thaxton now has a couple of options open, one would be a rematch: “We should do it again - he deserves another chance,” said Thaxton. “To be fair I thought it would be over early doors. But he did his homework and he took me to the wire,” he added.
A much bigger match would be against Amir Khan who KO’d Scott Lawton in 4 last Sunday.
The first three rounds of the Samuel Peter (29-1) - Jameel McCline (38-8-3) WBC interim heavyweight title fight were about as good as it gets in that depleted division. Peter took the first round with a jab that while effective would never be mistaken for one thrown by Larry Holmes. On his way to winning the second round Peter got rocked and dropped. Early in the third Peter hit the deck twice more but by that time McCline had about emptied his energy tank.
Peter was still a bit unsteady in the 4th but from the 5th round on he was in total charge, using his jab with an occasional over hand right and McCline was unable to punch with any authority to sustain or build on his early round lead. Peter got the judges vote (113-112, 115-111, 115-110) and ‘The Square Ring’s’ 116-112.
There’s some kind of message sent when a fighter retires the day before a fight. Marco Antonio Barrera (63-7) announced, “This will be my last fight” at the weigh-in for his match with Manny Pacquiao. It would be nice to report that he went out a winner - but that wasn’t the case. Four years ago when the two met, Pacquiao got a 12-round TKO. Not this time. Pattaya’s O.R. Cross filed the following report.
“Well, we got another freebie over here that you had to pay mucho baht for in Vegas. Although it was a pretty decent card, I’m glad I still have the coin in my pocket to spread around Walking Street.” (Jeeves note: That tells you all you need to know about the fight card - and about O.R.).
Mr. Cross continued: “I gave the first three rounds to Barrera who looked like he was set to counter Pacquiao’s aggression all night long. Barrera kept moving to his left, away from the southpaw’s power hand. Pacquiao looked a little cautious in the early rounds before finally getting untracked where his quicker hands started to show. Barrera was just that fraction slower and that makes a big difference in this sport. Barrera gave a good account of himself and certainly was a better opponent than he was in the last fight. No trilogy here. Barrera can be proud of his effort and should walk away from the fight game.”
He did. The two Nevada judges had it 118-109 while the outsider had it 116-112 - all for Pacquiao.
With this win the blather about Pacquiao being the “best pound-4-pound” fighter will emerge. ‘The Square Ring’ knows that as fact because even before the fight with Barrera the promoters said so. The current holder of the dubious “P4P” title is Floyd Mayweather jr.
“I think Pacquiao should be considered that (No.1 P4P),” said Bob Arum. “I don’t think Floyd Mayweather can beat either Miguel Cotto or Shane Mosley and I don’t see why anybody would pick Floyd to be a pound-for-pound best fighter in the world.”
“[Pacquiao’s] definitely the most exciting fighter in the world and there’s no arguments that people will call him the best pound for pound fighter in the world,” chimed in Oscar De La Hoya.
When all is said and done “P4P” has about as much relevance as a bar girl’s promise. Means a lot to some but not much to others.
It should come as no surprise to anyone with an IQ equal to or above the average mean temperature in Alaska that Mike Tyson pleaded guilty to charges of drug possession and driving under the influence. Lest you forgot, he tried to run over a security person, had cocaine in his vehicle and was higher than a kite when stopped. He originally pleaded “not guilty” but then upon further review changed his plea.
The change of mind was explained by attorney David Chesnoff: “Hopefully, we’ll be able to keep him out of prison and get probation. Mike has been clean and sober for eight months. He’s been doing community service work without a court order and has been talking to community groups about his own drug problems. It’s obvious this was a crime he was committing against himself.”
Kind of makes one all warm a fuzzy. If I were a parent, scary thought that, is Mike Tyson the guy I’d like to be tutoring my child? Yeah right!
Tyson could get up to 51 months in the Gray Bar Inn, which for those on the lunar calendar is 4.25 years.
Many believe that Tyson started to completely unravel on November 11, 1996. That’s the date of the first Tyson-Holyfield fight. Sports fans have moments that remain with them long after the event has faded. Most golfers can remember the collapse of Greg Norman at the 1996 Masters when Norman was leading by 6 over Nick Faldo going into the last round but choked big time and lost by 5.
In the 6th round of Tyson’s fight with Holyfield, he came out and hit Holyfield with the most “hellish power shot” ever thrown. It would have removed the head of a fully mature rhinoceros yet Holyfield not only didn’t blink, but he answered with a combination of lefts and rights that had Tyson mentally stunned. You could almost see Tyson’s mind asking, “What the fosh?” Which is what it sounds like if you have a lisp.
From then on Tyson was on the slippery slope down. Many in today’s society look upon everyone as a victim with no one taking responsibility for their actions. This, to be sure, is encouraged by attorneys and Tyson’s attorney, David Chesnoff, is certainly a prime example.
“If there had been more people interested in Mike’s well-being and health along the way, we wouldn’t be here now,” said Chesnoff.
Excuse me? The entire boxing world, which includes promoters, TV networks, boxing writers and boxing fans everywhere were concerned about Mike Tyson. The only person that wasn’t concerned about Mike Tyson was Mike Tyson. What a load of BS.
Mike Tyson’s name came up on the eve of the WBO heavyweight title defense of Sultan Ibragimov (21-0-1) against Evander Holyfield (42-8-2). The press release quoted Mike Tyson as saying boxing was a “hurt business”. It continued, “unfortunately for fight fans, most of the hurting in boxing’s glamour division has been happening outside the ropes as many top big men are too busy nursing various aches and pains to actually get into the ring and fight.”
Boris Grinberg, the champ’s manager, added, “Wladimir Klitschko, Oleg Maskaev, Ruslan Chagaev - all supposedly hurt or sick and unable to fight. It’s a disgrace to boxing that these so-called champions have all come up lame when this is the time when they should be taking this sport to the next level by unifying the belts. At least we have Sultan Ibragimov, a true warrior, to represent this sport properly.”
Ibragimov fights this coming Saturday in Moscow.
Yes Jeeves?
“Your Lordship, Mr. Don King, who promoted Peter-McCline, was asked about the heavyweight division. He replied, ‘There seems to be a mysterious back disease going around that only attacks Russian fighters. Klitschko, Maskaev and Chagaey all were affected. McCline and Peter are fighting to change the division.’
“How about that Your Lordship?”
He was right that for a heavyweight fight McCline - Peter was better than most. But to think that anything in the heavyweight division has changed would be the joke of the year - except for the official joke of the year as submitted by Monkey House Fred.
As you lay out our bountiful buffet of lagers, cigars and recorded music Jeeves, I’ll relay the joke of the year to you. “Two women were sitting together - quietly!”

Fortune shines at Emerald

PSC golf from P J Pool Bar

Tuesday, October 2, Greenwood B & A, Stableford
Perhaps the smallest group we have had for a long time, half a dozen, made the trip to Greenwood which we found to be in its usual excellent condition.
Barry Quirk (h/c 15) repeated the statement of intent he made last Thursday carding the excellent same score of 38 points to win. Neil Ormsby (h/c 36) making the most out of his modest handicap allowance carded 37 to be runner up.
David Gardner meanwhile had a bonanza knocking off 3 near pins leaving Jeff Wylie with only the one.
The average score for the day was 32 points.
Thursday, October 4, The Emerald, Stableford
Nine players teed it up on Thursday and Jimmy Fortune (h/c 29) continued to show his improving form by taking the day with 38 points. Paul Smylie (h/c 25) making a welcome return to play slipped up on the back nine having put together 20 points on the front nine, but he still secured runner up spot on 35 points. In third place was Jeff Wylie (h/c 4) with less than 35 points.
Jimmy Fortune snapped up one near pin and longest first putt on 18 whilst David Gardner, Malcolm Smith and Jim Smith claimed the other three near pins.
On a sadder note Sharon, one of our visiting American friends, took a step into space on exiting a shopping mall, which although only a small step for her was a giant leap for unkind, and she is likely out of the golf for a while.
Note: For any golfers seeking to play with our group please visit P J Pool Bar & Restaurant on Soi Watboonsamphan (Soi Kanoi) or phone Neil on 089 511 0575.

McDonald on fire at Greenwood

PSC golf from The Bunker

Monday, October 1,Bangpra, Medal
Two new faces won both the A and B flights on Monday at Bangpra. Playing a Medal competition, Scotty Eaton won the A Flight with a net 73 off a handicap of 6 and Roger Privett beat Geoff Parker to second place on a count back, both finishing with net 74.
Gordon Melia won the B Flight with the best score of the day, a two-under par net 70, ahead of Peter Habgood net 71 and Brian Walker net 72.
Near pin prizes were well spread around between Gordon Melia, Terry Sayers, Peter Habgood and Eddie Martin.
Wednesday, October 3, Greenwood, Stableford
John McDonald had the round of his life at Greenwood on Wednesday, winning the A Flight with a fantastic 44 points (gross 71) off his handicap of 7. Paul Smith came in second with a great round of 41 points and Jim Treen claimed third spot with 39 points.
Brian Walker won the B Flight with 42 points, Peter Habgood was in second on 39 points and Gordon Melia got third place with 38 points.
Near pin prizes were shared around again between Bob St Aubin, Scotty Eaton, John King and Jim Treen.
Friday, October 5, Plutaluang, Medal
Friday witnessed some more good golf from The Bunker Boys. Bob Turner won the B Flight with the best round of the day, scoring a three-under par net 69 to take the honours and a beer off Geoff Parker for the first time this year. Gordon Melia came second with a net 70 and Eddie Martin was third with net 73.
The A Flight was won by JJ Harney with a fine two-under par net 70, with Bob St Aubin one shot behind in second and Paul Smith third with a net 73 after beating Jim Treen on a count back.
The Bunker Bar’s annual golf championship takes place next week. It will be a two-day competition on Monday, October 15 at Mountain Shadow and Wednesday, October 17 at Crystal Bay. Pop into The Bunker Bar for more information or call 038 429 292.

White & Lavender triumph at Brian’s Birthday bash

PSC golf from The Caddyshack

Monday, October 1, Mountain Shadow, Stableford
The venue for the day was Mountain Shadow and the format was Stableford. There was only one division and the winner on the day was the very consistent golfer Graham Dietrich with a net par round of 36 points. In second place was Clive Bruce with 33 points, in third came the Irish raider J.J Harney with 31 points.
Peter Henderson and J.J. Harney both got a ‘2’ each so they played winner takes all in the lucky numbers game back at the Caddyshack ... and you guessed it, the luck of the Irish came through to take the prize.
Wednesday, October 3, Green Valley, Stableford
As reported earlier, the Caddyshack is now playing regularly every Wednesday at Green Valley. It’s a great course with many members taking advantage of this and other golfers joining the group at very reasonable green fees.
The winner today was Larry Nicolass who was the only golfer to break par with 37 points. In second place was Graham Dietrich with 33 points, third went to Bruce Tollitt with 30 points, and a mention has to go to Big Ronnie Millward who is improving and was not too far from a podium place with 26 points.
There were no 2’s recorded on the day so the rollover goes onto next Monday.
Friday, October 5, Greenwood, 2M-Scramble
Today was the Birthday bash of Brian Jacks, the ex-Superstars champion and Olympic medallist, who was 61 yrs old today and it was arranged that we do a 2-man Texas scramble with a maximum of 40 players, which filled up in no time and a few late entries had to be turned down.
The course selected was Greenwood and we have to say it was in perfect condition. The tournament was sponsored by Brian himself, The Caddyshack and San Miguel, with lots of technical and lucky draw prizes on offer.
Coming in third place was the hastily put together team of Ted Gardener and Ian Hart who returned a very nice round of net 65.4. In second place were the brothers Ritchie (Gary and Craig) with a net score of 63.6, but out up front, and not for the first time, was the partnership of Emmet White and Paul Lavender with a great score of net 61.8.
Near pins were highly contested with some very close shots taking the prizes. Archie Armstrong managed to win two of them with Gary Ritchie and Dave Smith sharing the other two. The long drive award went to Graham Beaumont with a great shot described as a Blondie (a fair crack, strait up the middle).
All in all it was a very nice day’s golf and after the presentation there was an evening buffet with the great sounds from the live San Miguel Band.

Brian Jacks (pictured 3rd right) with the day’s winners.

Cap’n Chris doubles

IPGC golf from The Haven

Monday, October 1, Crystal Bay, Stableford
1st Jens Gunnarsson 40pts
2nd Norman Isherwood 37pts
3rd Trevor Schirmer 36pts
4th B.J. Smith 35pts
The Iceman is back at last after several rounds calculated to make even the strongest of men cry, and with a terrific four-under handicap round he was found to be in excellent cheer again as he collected the drinking tokens from his surprised group of punters.
Norman Isherwood took the first of his two podium places with a very good one-under, ahead of the organizer Trevor Schirmer, who is starting to get his game together in another attempted push towards a single figure handicap.
B.J. Smith was also once again amongst the prize winners following an almost back to normal round, as he struggles to try and make 18 and 18 equal sixteen and still concentrate on the golf game.
Takeshi Hakozaki and Trevor Schirmer had a ‘2’ each in the first division pool whilst Roar Berger swept the pot including two rollovers in the second division.
Wednesday, October 3, The Emerald, Stableford
1st Chris Knapp 36pts
2nd Mike Dabanovich 34pts c/b
3rd Mikael Andersson 34pts c/b
4th Tom Sathrum 34pts c/b
Cap’n Chris Knapp took the first of his win doubles in the week with a solid level-par round that kept “Pike” and the rest of the naysayers quiet following the prize giving.
Following his recent return to some semblance of his usual form, Mike Dabanovich led home a group on two-over by virtue of a steadier back nine, which left Mikael Andersson and Tom Sathrum slightly adrift in third and fourth places.
There were no 2’s in the first division but Jens Gunnarsson had the one in the second division.
Friday, October 5, Phoenix, Stableford
1st Chris Knapp 39pts
2nd Barry Traynor 37pts c/b
3rd Norman Isherwood 37pts c/b
4th Jens Gunnarsson 36pts c/b
5th Tony Thorne 36pts c/b
Cap’n Chris is now well into the groove after several lessons at ‘The Keith Golf Academy’ and is now looking forward to getting payback for the expenditure by sometime around 2012. A two-shot margin ahead of the Silver Fox and the Rules Master is a bit special even if it is his “home course”, and he deservedly took the top step.
Barry Traynor was just good enough to outpace his playing partner, Norman Isherwood, over the back nine count back to claim second place.
Jens Gunnarsson made it to the prize list for the third time in the week with a steady level par round ahead of the fading Tony Thorne on the last three.
Barry Traynor, Russell Exley and Trevor Schirmer shared the rollover pot in the first division 2’s pool and Frank Pilkington and Geoff Picken shared the second division.
After feeling a little suicidal following his accident and phoning the Samaritans and getting switched through to a call centre in Pakistan, “Hoppalong” welcomed Frank Dunstan and also welcomed back Rodney Hayes and Barry McIntosh before presenting the prizes.

Mai’s Thai Restaurant stay on top

Pattaya Sports Club Friday Bowling League

200 Bowlers: Antero, La, Wade, Pao, Mai, Bill, Aht, Jon, Tukata and Teuvo.

Mai’s Thai Restaurant won three points from Diamond Shop behind great bowling by Wade and Bill Gibson. Wade had games of 215 & 235, 601 series and Bill had a 210 game, 558 series. Nual tipped 523 pins for Diamond Shop.
Konrad bowled a 520 series but his Brother D team could only come away with one point from their match against VFW Post 9876, but they are still in second place by half a point. Café Kronborg gained on first and second place teams as they won all four points from Beaver Bar & Grill. Rich, just back in town, bowled games of 188, 184 & 183 for a 555 series and Kran added a 539 to get Café Kronborg the win.
Three Sisters moved up the standings as they won three points from Jack & Tar. La had a 540 series for Three Sisters and Sven, just back from Sweden, bowled a 534 series. Morn led Café Ole to a three-point win over Montana after knocking down 521 pins. Antero, bowling as a pacer, bowled a great 245 game and 576 series.

The Caddyshack back on top

Pattaya Bowling Green News

This weeks fixtures did not look like there would be a lot of changes in the positions, but predictions can sometimes be so wrong.

Keith Fortt and Merv Pack celebrate their win for The Caddyshack.

Keith Fortt and Merv Pack, playing for The Caddyshack, went 7-0 down in the first few ends but came back in fine style to win a very close game 15-13 with the lead changing hands on virtually every end.
Meanwhile another very important game was being played out on the adjacent rink between the league leaders Panac and fourth placed Ianbern. It was another very close game with the lead changing throughout the game but the last few ends saw Ian and Bernard turn the screws and emerge winners by a 19-14 margin. This was great news for The Caddyshack as it put them back into first place by a single point.
The game between The Windmills and Chaplins was postponed to a later date.
Scheduled for the 21st of this month, there has been a bowls challenge offered to the Thai National team by the Bowling Green. This will consist of 12 bowlers in each team in a round-robin type tournament. The Thai team are presently in training for the forthcoming SEA Games but the Pattaya team, known as the Pattaya All Stars, are quietly confident on giving them a run for their money. Any persons wishing to watch the game will be most welcome so please look out for more information.

League Division 1

Pos.	Team	Played	Won	Drawn	Lost	Pts.	Diff.
1	Caddyshack	15	9	0	6	18	54
2	Panac	13	8	1	4	17	37
3	Ianbern	15	6	2	7	14	-10
4	Windmills	12	6	0	6	12	7
5	Anzacs	14	5	1	8	11	-16
6	Chaplins	11	4	0	7	8	-72