Fawlty Finances, part 1

Sometimes we like to take these articles into uncharted territory, publishing ground breaking ideas and pushing the envelope beyond the limits of mankind’s intellectual discovery processes to date. At others we’re quite happy just to engage in what Basil Fawlty called “majoring in stating the bleeding obvious”. Today will be one of the latter.
Halifax Financial Services’ latest research indicates that the last decade has been a great time to be rich. They don’t actually point out any bad decades to have been rich but their view is based around the facts that earnings growth for this period has been running at well above twice the rate of price inflation and that income among the 20% wealthiest households has risen 42% (as opposed to typical household income up by 39.5%) since 1997, compared to average price growth of 18.2% over that period.
Our view is that it has undoubtedly been a period of prosperity, characterised, like almost every period of prosperity, by greater concentration of the benefits of that prosperity in the hands of the most prosperous. Halifax research team clearly thinks it sounds neater to say that it’s been a ‘great time to be rich’.
One slight cloud on the horizon of the so-called mass-affluent (we hate those de-humanising labels that make it easier for large institutions to sell all their clients equally short of service by reducing them to the most average common denominator) has been education costs, which have risen 87% over the past ten years with rising school fees and the introduction of a new regime for university fees. In fact, bringing up a child could cost up to £150,000 in the UK according to Invesco Perpetual who suggest that parents should consider a long-term investment plan to help ease the burden of this (if you want private education for your children from two years of age until twenty two then it is at least double this cost).
Actually this makes a lot of sense - raising a child in the UK only costs parents upwards of £46 a week - an average total of £43,056 if the child is dependent until the age of 18. However, add in education costs, that becomes £150,000. Education costs tend to fall into 2 categories - private schooling (mainly from 13-18) and assistance with further or higher education after age 18.
The idea of also getting grandparents to plan their affairs tax-efficiently so that money goes to the grandkids educations rather than to the coffers of HMRC is also worthwhile and, of course, the new de minimis of pension regulations mean that UK-resident minors can have pension plans almost as soon as they are born. For expatriates the costs are of course generally far higher but in many cases employers provide assistance with pre-university fees. Also bearing out what many parents know to be true, Invesco Perpetual’s earth-shattering research reveals that the older a child gets, the more they cost - a child aged one year currently costs £45.50 a week on average, while a child aged 17 to 18 costs £56!
Housing, which has been the second most rapidly rising national cost of the past ten years, has had a disproportionately smaller effect on the rich, however, who (represented by the top 20% of earners) only pay out 8% of their annual income on housing costs, compared to 11% among the general public (although of course the Pound amounts are higher for the top 20%).
“The affluent classes have seen their earnings rise by more than twice the increase in prices over the past decade ... They have also become better-off compared to the typical household... While affluent families are more likely to feel the burden of rapidly rising private school fees and higher university tuition costs than other households, other factors are helping to keep affluent class inflation rates down,” said Halifax chief economist Tim Crawford.
Interesting report, both in terms of the data and what it reveals about Halifax’s views on personal service and client segmentation. Last year we, at MBMG wrote a lengthy article the beginning of which I’ll quote below:
“Some time ago we were somewhat astonished when we read that many offshore private banks are finding it difficult to continue providing specialist investment and banking services to the ‘medium-wealthy’. The initial cause of our discomfort was the term ‘medium wealthy’. It’s long been a pillar of faith with us that while all wealth may be relative, the single most important factor is that to the individual concerned it’s generally extremely important. Whether it’s Bill Gates needing to ensure that the IRR on his assets is adequate to ensure that he retains his primacy as the world’s richest individual while continuing to generously fund his and Melinda’s charitable endeavours or whether it’s someone in rural Thailand eking out a subsistence wage to be able to feed the family, for every individual’s own reasons, wealth is usually extremely important to each and every one of us. It is just too important to be simply boxed and categorised as HNW (High Net Worth), MW (Medium Wealthy) or the most appalling classification that we’ve seen used by any of the major banks, NWP (Not Worth Pursuing).”
That’s not to say that silk purses can be made out of cow’s ears but some solutions can usually be implemented at most levels of income that can help to improve an individual’s financial planning. Our Thai financial planning teams start offering schemes at just THB 2,000 per month, whereas offshore a monthly savings plan can be established for as little as GBP 50 per month. However, in terms of real wealth management (i.e. managing wealth that has already been created) a critical mass is, to some extent, required. Any finance company, whilst it should be recognised that certain minimum criteria have to apply to certain transactions, will always do its utmost to create highly personalised solutions for all investors. The process of quantifying clients needs in terms of liquidity, risk profile, tax-efficiency, required returns and a whole host of other variables that are extremely personal to each individual investor, is extremely time-consuming and intensive. The outcome of this process relies on finding a suitable solution for each individual need.
For as little as AUD 5,000, solutions can be fashioned that are acceptable to many investors. For as little as GBP 25,000 platforms can be utilised that create highly personalised portfolios. For just EUR 400,000 or USD 500,000 we believe that it’s possible to create the very best portfolio that any investor can buy - above that the only differences might be slightly reduced net charges. However, it appears that we are far from being the norm. The business strategies developed by banks at the height of the equity bull market, which relied on healthy revenues from portfolio management services, have proved to be unsustainable. This has caused many well-known banking names to drastically re-work their ways of doing business and, in some cases, to completely withdraw from providing any services at all but to the very wealthy.
To be continued…

The above data and research was compiled from sources believed to be reliable. However, neither MBMG International Ltd nor its officers can accept any liability for any errors or omissions in the above article nor bear any responsibility for any losses achieved as a result of any actions taken or not taken as a consequence of reading the above article. For more information please contact Graham Macdonald on [email protected]@mbmg-international.com.com

Snap Shots: by Harry Flashman

Want to be an ‘Events’ photographer?

This is the time of year for ‘events’, and if you have a half decent camera, you will be asked to take photographs at events and not just in the festive season. Happy Xmas! Happy Anniversary! Happy Birthday! Congratulations on your engagement, graduation, marriage, baptism! Congratulations on the divorce! Have a great vacation! It just goes on. Every week there will be some sort of celebration. Now have a look in your own family album and you will undoubtedly get all sorts of memories - here’s Gary when he graduated, Bill’s birthday, Wanda’s wedding or even Felix’s funeral.
For all these people, the event is an important milestone in their lives, in some way or another, and so the event deserves to be recorded properly. And guess what, you can’t do it with one shot. It takes a sequence of shots.
So to make sure that you can get the event in its entirety, here are a few hints. The secret is to start long before you get to the event venue and sit down and make yourself a list. A checklist, in fact. What you have to remember at all times, is just what is this event all about? Let us assume that the party you are going to record is a birthday. Here’s what you should be thinking about.
What do you need to show? Firstly you have to show that it is a birthday, not just any old party. Secondly you have to feature the person whose birthday it is. Thirdly you have to show who came to celebrate the birthday and fourthly any significant gifts that were received. Not even Henri Cartier-Bresson would be able to get all that lot into one photograph!
It should go without saying that you have checked your camera, it does work, you have spare film or memory stick/card and you do have spare batteries for the flash. Here is the type of list I would draw up if taking photographs for your child’s birthday:
1. Shot of birthday boy looking at a birthday card (close up - this gives the visual clue that it is a birthday)
2. Birthday boy opening present (close up - more clues)
3. As above with parents and friends standing around (wide angle shot)
4. Mother placing candles on birthday cake (classic clue)
5. Father lighting candles
6. Blowing out the candles (close up - an absolute “must”)
7. General shots of people singing and clapping
8. Happy time shots
Note that all these shots are designed to set the scene, show the participants and nominate the “star”. There are varied shots, some close up, some group shots and together they make a package called “Billy’s Birthday”.
Probably one of the most important items to remember is my adage - “Walk several meters closer!” When people are just small dots, you cannot pick out who they were, several months later. Do not be afraid to walk in close - this one factor alone will result in much better pictures.
For many of the shots, you will also have to be prepared, because when the action happens at an event, it can happen very quickly. For example, blowing out the candles. You can’t say, “Sorry, I wasn’t ready. Can you do it again please?” The name of the game is to know what you need to shoot, and be ready for it.
Now when you come to put them in the family album, you have a nice group of pictures which many years later will continue to say “Billy’s Birthday”, unmistakably. And you made it happen photographically. Well done!
So next time you are going to photograph an important event, plan your shots, take them deliberately according to the plan and be amazed at how much better your results will be!
One final word of warning. When you have become the ‘official’ photographer for any event, you cannot be the life and soul of the party until you have taken all the shots on your list. You are being relied upon to come home with the goods. You can’t do it with a belly full of gin and tonics!

Modern Medicine: by Dr. Iain Corness, Consultant

And a pox on your chickens!

With Bird Flu from chickens being a present threat, I felt that this week we should review another chicken disease. Chicken pox! This was brought home to me when I picked up my laundry and Madame Laundry paraded this child in front of me, covered in the characteristic spots.
Of course, chicken pox (AKA Varicella) is not really caused by chickens, nor even carried by them. Chicken pox is a common disease caused by the varicella zoster virus which is a member of the herpes virus family. It is very contagious and all communities experience epidemics.
A few years back there was a real outbreak in Thailand, with 22,833 patients with the complaint between January and May. This nasty condition never actually leaves the community, lying quiet for a while and then attacking in epidemic proportions. Make no mistake about this one, it is a most aggressive disease that sweeps through schools and institutions and while generally a disease of children, it can attack adults too with devastating results.
The varicella zoster virus is known for the characteristic chickenpox lesions. These come out very quickly after an initial period of vague symptoms such as fever and aches in muscles and joints. The lesions (vesicles) are very superficial on the skin and grow like a mini-Vesuvius, burst and then crust over. That cycle of events takes around four days, but new crops of vesicles come up in waves in the first three or four days, so you can have some vesicles growing bigger while earlier ones are drying up and crusting over.
The vesicles generally come out on the trunk and face first, but can spread to all over the body and even inside the mouth and on the tongue. Now while scarring is always a worry for the Mums of this world, there are far worse effects from this little virus. There is a distinct possibility of an encephalitis in older children and adults can actually develop a varicella pneumonia. Pregnant women who get chickenpox also run the risk of infecting the unborn child, and this can run as high as 10 percent. Very often, especially if the child scratches the lesions, there can be an added infection by an opportunistic bacterium on top of the viral lesions, so you get a double problem.
So what do you do when chickenpox is doing the rounds? The first thing is to keep away from those who have the disease. It is highly contagious and is spread by inhalation of micro droplets in the air, or by direct contact with weeping vesicles. In a family, this means that little Johnny gets his own towel that no-one else must use and a bed-time kiss is strictly forbidden.
Calomine lotion does help with itchy and weeping vesicles and trim the fingernails in young children to lessen the chances of scratching. With very little ones, I even suggest putting their hands in socks, just as you do with little babies.
If the temperature is raised (more than 37.5 Celsius) then a little paracetamol will help (but not aspirin as this drug should not be used with children), and if there is the “super-infection” by a bacterium it will be necessary for your doctor to prescribe an appropriate antibiotic.
The other important duty that you have as a parent is do not send little Johnny back to school until the very last vesicle has dried up. This is generally around a week to ten days, but is so important in trying to stop the epidemic.
The other nasty part of this virus is that it lies dormant in your system and can strike back many years later as Shingles, or as we medico’s call it, Herpes Zoster. No, chickenpox is not fun, and to those of you who are struggling with it right now, you have my sympathies.
However, we do have a varicella vaccine these days, and vaccination is recommended from about 12 months of age. Like all vaccination programs, this will radically reduce the impact of epidemics.

Learn to Live to Learn: with Andrew Watson

Paris in the Autumn

There was a stiff, clinical, wintry chill in the autumn air that frankly, took my breath away. I was taken a little bit by surprise and had to check my geographical and mental compasses. Now, I know Paris is getting towards northern Europe and everything, but having just been in London, where I had felt the last vestige of an Indian summer warm my back, I felt I was entitled to more of the same. But then, as I alighted at Place de Clichy in the heart of Montmartre, my heart was warmed by a Friday night lit up with the passion of Paris, illuminated by what seemed like a thousand coloured candles stretching in reverence towards the spiritual and artistic heart of this great city.

The heart of Paris, the Arc de Triomphe.
From the air, Paris sparkles, rues and avenues criss-crossing, pulsating around her throbbing golden heart, the Arc de Triomphe. From twenty thousand feet, the Seine could be measured only by the absence of light; her infinite darkness serving only to accentuate the brilliance of all around her. The Stade de France was alight this night, an awesome vision indeed and an appropriate colosseum for the Gladiators of today; only days before it had played host to the Rugby World Cup Final in which South Africa ground out a deserved victory against the best of English beef (don’t mention the disallowed try).
The morning burst quiet and clear and blue and I was out of the door of my rather splendidly plush lodgings with the lark. Before the traffic had a chance to accrue, whilst Friday night worked its way out of Parisians’ dizzy heads, it was as if I had the city to myself.

Through the lattice, all was cool, winter blue.
I took a drive south down Rue de Rome, past St-Lazare with its very Gallic “turtle” metro entrance. The traffic lights at this hour were but a superfluous addition and in my condition of contented reverie, I had little inclination to obey French law.
Rue Tronchet opened the way to Rue Royale and one of the most impressive city-sights anywhere on earth: Place de la Concorde. Separating the infinitely romantic Tuilerie Gardens from the beginning of the Champs Elysées, Louis XV’s architect Jacques Ange Gabriel began construction in 1754 and completed it in 1763. Its beauty hides a dark secret; it became “Place de la Révolution” and Madame Guillotine mercilessly removed the heads of Louis XVI, Marie-Antoinette, Danton, Robespierre, and 2800 others here between 1793 and 1795. It is said that the smell of blood was so strong that a herd of cattle refused to cross the place.
A statue of Louis XV, which once held centre stage, removed during the Revolution, was replaced by the Obelisk of Luxor, courtesy of the viceroy of Egypt, Mohamed Ali. Its sister stands, less gloriously, on the embankment of the Thames, in London.
I buzzed along the banks of “La Rive Gauche”, past the military majesty of “Les Invalides”. Round the bend in a trice and the full wonder of the Eiffel Tower was in view, this vast conglomeration of 15,000 iron pieces (excluding rivets) and forty tons of paint. The shape of the tower, all 1652 steps-worth of it, I was reliably informed, was determined by mathematical calculation involving wind resistance. It swings over a foot at the top in strong winds. In empathy, I swung right, towards the austere crescent of the neo-classicist Trocadero, accelerating now, both soft-top and pedal down. It was exhilarating.
Avenue Kléber is one of the twelve pulmonary avenues leading in and out of the Arc de Triomphe, pumping life through the city. I travelled up it at “more than average speed” towards that excitable motorist’s heaven and roared onto the roundabout. Other vehicles were but lace curtains in the path of my bullet and I tore in appropriately Parisian fashion round and around and around. Charles Aznavour was crooning “The Old Fashioned Way” on the radio and the sun was twinkling through the bronzed leaves of the Champs Elysées. All I needed was a beautiful woman by my side. I turned to my right and there she was; as indeed she had been all along. Her presence on a day like today was absolutely essential. Indeed, it was ever thus in Paris, city of lovers.
Cruising down the Champs Elysées, the inevitable odour of coffee and croissants swept into our senses. It was time for an infusion. Vesuvio Café was our spot, as we engaged in one of the quintessential Parisian past-times – people watching. My, they dress well, my they move well, all elegance and coiffured confidence. Such attention to aesthetic detail. And the coffee’s great.
On the road again. No visit to Paris could feasibly exclude at least one Art Gallery. My last visit to the mother of all galleries, the Louvre, had been pre-pyramid. Hitherto, my favourite had been the Musée D’Orsay, the former train station turned Impressionist temple (here’s a clue by the way, when visiting D’Orsay: head straight for the fifth floor, or you’ll never reach Van Gogh’s “Starry Night” or the simply sensational Salon dedicated to Odilon Redon). But now, entering The Louvre via its subterranean avenue, I was awe-struck. God bless the architects of this immaculate sanctuary, fitting home to some of history’s most perfect works of art. The Pyramide Inversée sprinkled the spectrum on to our faces and the smooth marble all around. Above, through the lattice, all was cool, winter blue.
I found myself in front of Da Vinci’s “Virgin and the Rocks” with all its chiaroscuro and observed it in a new light, with Dan Brown’s “Da Vinci Code” fresh in my mind. Down the corridor a bit and to the right is the centre piece of the Denon Collection, “La Gioconda”, better known as the Mona Lisa. It was early still, but there was a crowd of pilgrims gathered around, set back as protocol demands, a good distance from the canvas. It was good to see her again, but for me, there was someone still more special around the next corner; someone who had brought painting to life for me and perhaps, had much to do with me becoming a painter. “Size and scale are not synonymous,” I was once taught, but the hopelessly romantic Delacroix puts this to the sword. I stood smiling in front of the 4 x 5 metre “The Death of Sardanapal” and remembered his words which resonated with me so powerfully then as now; “Black is death to the artist”. Indeed. Delacroix and Paris, a perfect marriage. For a few glorious moments, nothing else mattered.
Next week: On the Road Again

Doc English, the Language Doctor: Skills your child can use to read and decipher new words

Hello and welcome! This week we include a whole bucket load of tips and techniques for teaching your children English at home.
Last week we talked about how to encourage your child to talk and discuss stories during and after they have read. This week we look at skills your child can use to read and ‘decipher’ (read and understand) new words and we’ll concentrate on the story text.
If your child is very young, or has a very basic grasp of English, they may need to learn the ‘letter sounds’ (phonemes). A good way to do this is to visit ‘phonics’ websites such as www.starfall .com or www.bbc.co.uk/schools, which include games and activities for learning individual letter sounds and sound combinations. These sites are very good for developing your child’s letter recognition, reading and listening skills. If you sit with your child and talk about what you see on screen, then these activities can also be good for practicing speaking skills.
As your child reads, get them to break a word down into individual sounds (e.g. c-a-t) and help blend the sounds together to form the word (c+at). Notice the initial, middle and end sounds. Be patient and don’t make your child read every word as they will quickly get bored. Concentrate on the smaller words first of all and later on progress to longer words. Books containing words of no more than 1 or 2 syllables are best to start with. Read the same book over a few times, perhaps once every night for a few nights. Each time find a different aspect of the story to talk about so it does not get boring.
If a word continues to be a problem, write it down on a ‘flashcard’ and stick it on the bedroom wall, or collect a number of ‘tricky’ words and play ‘word bingo’ with them at the end of the week.
Ensure your child understands the meaning of the word they are reading. For older children, encourage them to look up new words in a dictionary, so as to encourage them to discover the meaning of new words independently. Try to find a good quality dictionary, as cheaper ones can contain errors. Younger children can start with a picture dictionary. Talking dictionaries can also be beneficial.
Encourage your child to notice the shape of new words, the number of syllables and how the word begins or ends. Think of words you know that rhyme with the new word, or different words with a similar meaning. Help your child create their own mini dictionary and record new words in alphabetical order. Most importantly, provide a continual stream of praise as your child reads and don’t over-correct. Ask questions to ensure your child understands what they’re reading and take time to discuss the detail in illustrations. Encourage your child to look for ‘picture clues’ within the illustrations that might help them better understand what they have read.
Choose books on a similar theme each month (e.g. animals, families, fairytales, poems, etc.) so that children do not have to learn a whole new set of words every time they read. Ideally, each time they read, the text should be just slightly higher than their current language level. There should be just a few new words each time for them to learn. This way, your child will progress gradually without feeling like they are climbing a brick wall.
Finally, know when to quit. If your child is getting bored or frustrated, throw in the towel and choose to read another day, or switch the book if the story is becoming too boring. Play a game, such as ‘eye spy’ with the book, or ‘hangman’. Draw and label a picture of a character or scene from the story, or dress up and role play the story together.
I hope you found these tips useful. Next week we take a break from reading and discuss ways of encouraging your child to speak in English at home. Remember, you can send your questions or suggestions to me via the Pattaya Mail, or you can email me at docenglishpattaya @gmail.com. Hope to hear from you soon!