Dear Hillary,
After saving for three years, I have been on an extended holiday here in Thailand for the past six weeks and will be going back to Blighty in two weeks time. I had a companion who I found in a bar in Pattaya who has been with me for all that time, and I have looked after her well in return including a weekly allowance of 15,000 baht.
I would like to give her something when I leave for her to remember me by, and want you to suggest something that she will like. Please keep the suggestions within a reasonable budget. I am not a Cheap Charlie but it is the end of my holidays.
Chris
Dear Chris,
What do you really expect me to say, my Petal? Why not buy her a house, a motorcycle and a year’s free veterinary bills for the family buffalo? You’ll be able to get all that for under five million. And since you don’t want to appear as a Cheap Charlie, throw in a house for Mumma and Papa as well. Chris, come down from the clouds, you have had the services of a ‘mia chow’ (rented wife) for the past six weeks, for which you have already paid 60,000 baht a month which is well above the going market price. She will remember you, “He was the nice farang man who bought me this gold chain which I am now taking to the pawn shop.” Enjoy what is left of your holiday and spend your money on yourself.
