Dear Hillary,
The other morning I picked up my husband’s clothes which he had left in the bathroom, having been out for a night on the town with the boys. In the pocket there were some little diamond shaped blue pills. I did not say anything to him about this, as I didn’t want him to think I go through his pockets, but this has worried me. Are these the pills they call “ya ba”? I know there is a crackdown on all kinds of drugs at present. Do you think he is an addict and should I force him to go and see a doctor?
Worried Wilhelmina
Dear WW,
You are having me on, aren’t you, my Petal. Let me reassure you that illegal drugs such as Ya Ba do not come in neat blue diamonds, but the ones you have found are much more likely to be “Yah Hoo!” pills. These have been analyzed and are found to contain 3% Vitamin E, 2% Aspirin, 2% Ibuprofen, 1% Vitamin C, 5% Spray Starch and 87% Fix-A-Flat. Suggest you give him some condoms before his next boys’ night out and say, “These will go with your medication, dear.”
