‘Scousers’ join Ferrari (thank you Les Edmonds)

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For those unsure of the term ‘Scouser’, the following explanation was given to me by a genuine ‘Scouser’.  A Scouser is indigenous to Liverpool, England generally of mixed Irish / English heritage and renowned for their sharp wit and repartee!  Also known to be thieving, almost likeable rogues.  Anything that can be stolen, they will steal, even if it is nailed down, and jokes are made of this.

So here is Les Edmonds’ example.  (I have seen this before, but it still is amusing):

“The Ferrari F1 team fired their entire pit crew yesterday.

Ferrari pit crew in action Ferrari pit crew in action

This announcement followed Ferrari’s decision to take advantage of the British government’s ‘Work for your Dole’ scheme and employ some Liverpudlian youngsters.

The decision to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths from Toxteth were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 4 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari’s existing crew could only do it in 5 seconds with millions of pounds worth of high tech gear.

It was thought to be an excellent, bold move by the Ferrari management team as most races are won and lost in the pits, giving Ferrari an advantage over every other team.  However, Ferrari got more than they bargained for!

At the crew’s first practice session, not only was the Scouse pit crew able to change all four wheels in under 4 seconds but, within 12 seconds, they had re-sprayed, re-badged and sold the car to the McLaren team for 8 cases of Stella, a bag of weed and some photos of Lewis Hamilton’s bird in the shower.”