Dear Hillary,
I am sitting in my lonely room on Valentine’s Day, with no friends to visit me, no roses or Valentine’s Day cards, no chocolates, nothing. I feel I am in prison, but worse. At least in prison there are people to talk to. What should I do, Hillary?
Jerry
Dear Jerry,
Sorry you had a lonely St. Valentine’s Day. If you had contacted me earlier you could have taken me to a lovely Valentine’s dinner, complete with roses, champagne (French and very, very cold) and chocolates. Make a note in your next year’s diary to send me a letter two weeks before and you can call it Be my (lovely) Valentine. BTW, you can buy electric bed warmers at the supermarkets.
