Dear Hillary,
Found the “nice” girl you are always telling us to look for, but I had hoped for a bit more than holding hands. Not even a kiss goodnight and that was on the second date, not the first. I mean I am not looking for my life’s partner here, but a bit better response is needed if I am going to keep on looking for your “nice” ones.
Jacq
Dear Jacq,
Have you stopped to consider that you may not be the “nice” chap she hoped you would be. It looks to me as if sex is all you want from the relationship, and if so, the place for you is in the go-go bar, where the girls there know what and why and how much. And your name “Jacq”, where does that come from Petal?