I have not been here very long

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Dear Hillary,

I have not been here very long, but after two weeks I have now got a steady girlfriend.  She has invited me to go up to her village for a couple of days and stay with her mother in her mother’s house.  Now she is talking about buying a TV set for the folks, but I get the feeling it is me who is going to buy this.  Am I being played for a sucker?

Newbie

Dear Newbie,

Yes you are.  Run now!