Public holiday problems

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Dear Hillary,

I get confused with all the holidays in Thailand.  Every month there appears to be some sort of public holiday, and even all the western holidays seem to be celebrated as well.  We have had the western new year, and there’s the Chinese and Thai versions as well.  There’s the Buddhist holidays and the royal ones we’ve just had.  The office girl is forever doing something for another “Buddha Day” and rolling up late.  Have you any suggestions as to how I can work out when the next holiday is due?

Confused Charlie

Dear Confused Charlie,

Have you ever thought of looking at a Thai calendar, my Petal?  I’m sure there must be one hanging on a nail in your office.  I don’t know, you men appear to be getting thicker and thicker.  Now send chocolates before I get annoyed!