Dear Hillary,
My problem I believe to be a common one. The morning fight with the mixer tap for the shower. That little handle which you point to the right for cold, or left for hot, or maybe vice-versa since you can never remember in the morning. But it is worse than that. The pesky little lever has a hair trigger mechanism behind its chrome exterior. Move it one millimeter one way and the water is so hot it would take the fur off a moose. Move it one millimeter the other way and you freeze to death. It can also do this hot-cold trick on its own, usually when you are totally immersed with shampoo in your hair, and now in your eyes! How do I correct this problem? You are a lady of experience, so I’m sure you’ve met the problem and will have the answer for me.
Faucet
Dear Faucet,
So I’m now an expert in hydroponics (no wait, that’s for growing organic lettuce), no it’s called hydrodynamics (I looked it up). I most certainly do have the answer for you, Faucet, my wet little Petal. You have to learn the old adage, when in Rome, do as the Romans do. You are in Thailand, so do what the Thais do – you have cold showers. The Thai people also found the impossible mixer tap problem, and fixed it by bringing the lever all the way to the right and letting it rip! See! That was easy!
