Some ignoble expats are giving sighs of relief for the third year running that next month’s Songkran water festival will be a dry affair. Everyone knows the general idea: a gentle water exchange on the hands as a sign of renewal on Wan Lai or Flowing Day. Pattayans, a raunchy lot some say, never liked this particular interpretation outside the hallowed precincts of the five star hotels where tradition has always had a stake. It’s much more fun to drench all those you meet with buckets of H2O, engage in liquid street battles onboard trucks and rub white powder onto the midriff of anyone fanciable who happens to be within range.
The Centre for Covid-19 Situation Administration is aware that the national purpose of Songkran is to get the tills ringing, but a return to water sports at the moment could increase the odds on coronavirus biting even harder. The only legal way to splash water, according to spokesman Dr Taweesann Visanuyo, will be to select an “open and spacious area” and apply for a permit to start the fun. However, the organizers must ensure no alcohol is on tap, masks are worn at all times even when moist, physical distance is observed and white substances forbidden. Anyone attending must show evidence of a negative ATK test, although to whom and how is not exactly free of ambiguity.
In other words, Pattaya Songkran is dead for another year. In the past, the most popular area for sport was in central Pattaya at or near the main police station, highly unlikely to be given the status of an “open and spacious area” in this context. Here. a favorite pastime used to be to try and unseat passing motor cycle drivers by hurling the contents of buckets at them. At least this year the reservoirs are fullish, so it won’t be necessary to justify the ban on the grounds that the environmentally-hostile local populace is wasting a diminishing natural resource.
According to Pattaya City Hall, the ban this year includes a new category: no foam parties. According to an informal survey by Pattaya Mail, this term is not comprehended by locals although one man thought it was a fire extinguisher out of control. A foam party is actually made possible by a ceiling-mounted generator that drops vast quantities of foam from the ceiling onto customers in a night club. Given that these avenues of pleasure are currently closed in Thailand, unless doubling as restaurants, the need even to mention foam parties is not obvious. Wikpedia says they are dangerous anyway: one man in Turkey was electrocuted when the foam descended as he was adjusting his hearing aid.
In any case, reviving Songkran is not the answer to Thailand’s tourist depopulation. The Federation of Thai Industries and many others say the solution is to end Test and Go and the surrounding entry bureaucracy which is far more cumbersome than that now being introduced by neighboring countries. If Thailand is serious, she needs to get rid of compulsory registration on a website (open to hacking it seems), prior booking of an hotel on entry (to wait for a test result) and all requirements for medical insurance. That’s precisely what Cambodia, Vietnam and Malaysia are currently doing. Time for a serious rethink in the Land of Smiles.
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