Amateur psychologists are plentiful. Every pub has its own resident psychologist. I am sure you have met more than one.
One of the biggest problems, from the medical doctor’s viewpoint, is the current surfeit of “fifty baht psychologists.” Everybody these days feels as if they are entitled to voice their opinion as to the psychological “wholeness” of everyone else. Never mind all the amateur psych’s, there are bookshelves now crammed with paperbacks of psychological advice for every problem the world could ever have. Unfortunately, most of them should only be used for holding doors open or throwing at predatory puppies.
You see, what many forget is that experiencing the whole range of human emotions is part of our “normal” lives. Anger, hurt, elation, depression, sadness, grief, despair, dejection, rejection, joy, excitement or desolation are all very normal human emotions. If you take these away, what are you left with? You are left with a “zombie” – an unfeeling being that is unable to express real emotion.
Now why is this a problem to us doctors? It becomes a problem because people begin to believe that somehow it is “wrong” to feel sad when, for example, one of life’s calamities strikes. Instead of working through the grief or despair, the patient is encouraged by family and friends to go and see the doctor and ask for some Prozac, or this month’s “wonder drug.” In this country, with powerful medications being available over the counter without prescription, this poses an even greater threat to normal reactions and normal recoveries.
I repeat, there is nothing wrong with showing normal emotions. Goodness me, even my cat lets me know when it is displeased with something I have done (generally given it some cat food it doesn’t particularly like) and it expresses true emotion. It does not need a magic tablet. It will get over it.
And so it is with people too. The reason for the depression, or elation, eventually becomes accepted by your emotional self and the middle of the road “normalcy” returns. You don’t need a magic tablet either (though I might draw the line at eating cat food.)
Now, of course, there can be pathological forms of emotional disturbance too. Deep dark lingering depression, without any real basis for it, is a pathological condition, but depression over financial woes, personal loss or the passing of a loved one is “normal”. This type of emotional problem only requires treatment (and I didn’t say “tablets”) when the person involved finds they are unable to come out over the top of it after a reasonable period of time. Many times the only treatment necessary is a friendly ear to allow the person to talk through their “normal” emotional responses.
Unfortunately, many societies look upon anything to do with emotions as displaying weakness. The old “big boys don’t cry” theme again. Just look at the way you grew up with parents who would say, “You’re OK. It’ll be better in the morning.” No sympathetic words as that would make you a ‘softie’.
No, sadness and happiness are part of our normal make-up and indeed part of our lives. Accept it and move on to the next day. No magic tablets required.
