American Robert (Bob) Pelletier is one of that large group of farang who settled in Pattaya around the beginning of the century. Born in 1939 at the port city of New Bedford, Massachusetts, he spent some years in Fall River, more famous perhaps for the alleged but unproven murders of Lizzie Borden.
Bob gained a degree in accountancy – “money is always an interesting subject” – and joined the National Guard before being called up on active duty in the army air corps. He had an early military career to become Assistant Chief of Protocol and resigned in 1963. Bob then settled into a financial career, working for many years as a dealer consultant or chief financial officer for various companies including General Motors.
He discovered Thailand in 1997 as a tourist and took up Pattaya residence in 2004. He had already met his permanent Thai partner Oh and they have lived together ever since. “What matters in gay or straight relationships is love, commitment and letting the other person have air to breathe,” says Bob, “and we have our own friends and hobbies.” He adds that, as you get older, you need someone to lift you up literally and figuratively.
Retirement years, even in Fun City, can be boring with nothing to do. Bob is a keen bridge player and was one of the 30-plus foreigners arrested for gambling in 2016. “It was a very unfortunate mistake by the authorities and we were never charged or taken to court,” he explains, “but several members were in their nineties and found the several hours of confinement at the police station extremely upsetting as they needed their medicine.”
Bob has substantial experience of condominium affairs as a member, and twice chairman, of the management committee. “It’s interesting voluntary work and I dealt mostly with executive affairs as the day to day running is the responsibility of a management company,” he recalls. Bob still sits on the committee and, whilst we were talking, two tenants came to tell him about a water leak and a noisy neighbor. Bob is a good listener and certainly needs to be.
Most years Bob returns to America for a month or so to visit his extended family. I asked him what he finds attractive about living in Pattaya. “The hospital system here is good, quality restaurants are plentiful and the locals are mostly friendly and good natured.” But he adds that the best places to live tend to deteriorate over time. “Pattaya was green and clean when I arrived here, but the traffic chaos and the urban sprawl are obviously negative factors these days. But you learn to live with it all.”
And the gay scene? “Sure, that’s changed a lot too. When I first arrived, all the action was in gay bars and issues like same sex marriage were never mentioned. Even holding a gay pride rally was controversial to some people. These days, gay life is open and sexual orientation is becoming an irrelevance in Thailand which is an excellent development.” Bob concludes, “Even in your eighties you can be out and proud.”
