The Backyard Golf Society
After a few weeks with insufficient numbers for a competition, the Backyard Boys returned to action at Emerald last Friday, August 15. We have several commuting oil and gas workers in our party so we usually have to wait for a few of them to be back for a quorum.
The winner on the day and heading down rapidly in his handicap rating was Dan ‘The Diet Whiskey Man’. Obviously his incarceration a couple of months ago has prompted ‘Diet’ to focus on his golf, much the same as McIlroy’s break-up with ‘what’s-her-name’.
Dan ‘The Diet Whiskey Man’ celebrates his win with the staff at Blue Sky Bar.
Near-pin today was a fizzer, no one managed to properly judge the high level wind and stay on the dance floor. Skins were well doled out, with 6 going to Dannie ‘Beaker’ Larsen, 5 to ‘Diet Whiskey’, 4 to ‘Second-hand’ Bob, 2 to ‘Irish’ John and 1 to Russell ‘He’s a Victorian’ Benson.
WADA (the World Anti-doping Agency) can sleep well at night, the “pop the blue tablet before golf experiment” conducted by ‘Diet’, ‘Golden Trowel’s Boyfriend’ and ‘Second-hand’ Bob showed absolutely no performance enhancement, with rumours of a sun-dial competition proving to be unfounded.
‘Second-hand’ Bob was reported to have made an emergency dash off the course on the back 9; apparently his sticky date pudding from Thursday night had a serious affect on his svelte figure, prompting some to ask if sticky dates should be provided to all racing car drivers before a GP!
