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Family Money: Ex-rated
movements
By Leslie Wright
Last week we looked at how currency movements can
affect your investments.
If you invest your capital in one currency into
equities valued in another currency, you stand to make a profit if your
own currency depreciates against the other one, even if your chosen stock
moves sideways (i.e., neither gains nor loses.)
This scenario is relatively easy to follow, even if
widely misunderstood.
Things become far more complex (and hence more
difficult to grasp) when you invest capital accumulated in one currency
into an institutional fund denominated (i.e., priced) in a second
currency, which itself is dealing in bonds or equities in a country which
uses a third currency, and you need to draw down an income from that
investment to cover local expenditure in yet a fourth currency - say, Thai
baht.
The single country scenario
To illustrate this in its simplest form, you might, for
instance, be investing your pounds sterling into a dollar-denominated
Thailand stock market fund, which, as can easily be surmised from its
name, is holding a basket of shares bought on the SET in Thai baht.
In this scenario the movement of the dollar against the
Thai baht is cancelled out, and the significant currencies (as far as you
are concerned) are just sterling and baht.
If the SET goes up (or rather, the fund’s component
shares do) and the exchange rate remains the same, you make a profit in
both sterling and/or baht.
Similarly, if the fund’s price remains the same but
the Thai baht strengthens against sterling you still make a profit in
sterling terms (although not in baht when the sterling value is converted
back should you then remit your sterling over here; again, the currency
movement has been cancelled out.)
Thus if you were investing sterling or dollars or
whatever into Thailand funds and then remitting the proceeds back into
Thailand, the currency movements have all been cancelled out in local
terms, and the amount of baht you receive would approximate to the
movement of the local investment.
But this is a unique situation.
The multi-currency scenario
If you had similarly invested pounds sterling into a
dollar-denominated Japanese equity fund, and upon selling up, planned to
remit the proceeds to Thailand, you’d have to consider not only the
price movement of the fund (which would inherently reflect both the rise
or fall of the underlying Japanese equities and movement of the Yen
against the dollar), but also the relative strength of $/ฃ and
ฃ/baht.
What you thought was a profit may in fact be a loss
masked by relative currency movements.
You may at this point be imagining how complex the
exercise becomes if your chosen fund is investing throughout a region such
as Asia, Europe, or even globally, where a multiplicity of currencies may
be involved.
How many currencies would you need to watch then?
In fact, the answer is really the same as for the
rather simpler Japanese Equity fund (i.e., a single-country fund) in the
example above.
The movements of individual component stocks and the
movements of the various currencies involved will be reflected in the
overall price movement of the fund in question, expressed in a single
currency.
This makes the real value of your international
holdings considerably simpler to translate into your base currency (if
this is different from the currency the fund is denominated in) than if
you had placed the investments directly into the underlying stocks.
Then you would indeed have to track not only the stock
movements but also the pertinent currencies - a laborious, time-consuming
and potentially confusing exercise which most amateur investors are not in
a position to undertake.
Hedging the currency risk?
Just to muddy the water a little more, you may elect to
invest into a diversified portfolio comprising several such funds.
You may then be dealing with perhaps three or four
currencies - dollars, sterling, Euros, deutschmarks, Swiss Francs and
perhaps even yen.
But the exercise of establishing the real worth in
terms of your base currency of such a diversified portfolio is only
slightly more laborious than keeping tabs on the single-country exercise
(the Japanese equity fund) cited earlier.
You simply convert the value of each fund into your
base currency (or any other single currency you may be interested in) at
the prevailing relative exchange rate, to have an overall picture of your
portfolio’s real value in your ‘favourite’ currency.
Many people believe that holding a diversified
portfolio of funds denominated in various currencies provides an automatic
currency hedging mechanism which can be useful in removing exchange-rate
fluctuation risk.
Similarly, some investors who believe the Euro will
strengthen against, say, sterling think that holding a fund denominated in
Euros will enable them to make a gain on this movement.
In fact, they are deluding themselves, and demonstrate
a common misunderstanding.
The fact that one currency gains against another does
not increase the fundamental value of the component holdings within a
particular fund, nor vice versa.
Fundamental value is the key
For instance, consider just one stock within an equity
fund.
If its price moves sideways (i.e., no gain or loss) and
the denomination of the fund is different from the currency the stock is
valued in, the stock’s value in terms of the denominated currency will
have moved inversely to the currency movement.
As this concept is where the misunderstanding stems
from, let me explain.
Stock A is priced in French francs but the fund holding
it is priced in Euros. If the Euro strengthens against the French franc,
but the stock price in FF remains unchanged, its value in Euros will have
decreased by the same amount that the Euro has strengthened against the
French franc.
So if the investor holding the fund bought his units
originally with sterling, at first guess he may think he’s made money.
However, if sterling has not moved upwards along with
the Euro, but maintained its exchange rate with the French franc, he may
well be initially disappointed to find that his fund’s unit value has
dropped (being priced in now-more valuable Euros), and confused when he
translates that value into sterling to find that his sterling value is
exactly the same as it was before the Euro gained strength!
To make money from this particular scenario would in
fact require sterling to have depreciated against the French franc; and
what the Euro did in this scenario is entirely irrelevant to a sterling
investor.
And this same argument applies to any other
intermediary currency.
Arbitrary denomination?
I am frequently asked why many funds investing into
Europe (or Asia) are denominated (i.e., priced) in US dollars.
The simple answer is that the fund’s assets have to
be valued in something just to establish what units in the fund are worth
on the international market.
A pan-European fund could just as well be valued in
deutschmarks (some are) or Euros (some are) or Swiss francs (some are).
But the underlying assets - i.e., the stocks &
shares that make up the fund - are of course bought and sold in the
prevailing local currency.
In the case of a pan-European fund this will mean that
some component stocks will be traded in Italian lira, French francs,
Spanish pesetas, Danish kroner, Dutch guilders, and so on - as well as the
deutschmarks or Swiss francs that the overall fund is valued in.
But to simplify matters for investors, the fund’s
value - and therefore price - is expressed in a single currency.
Whether this is in dollars, deutschmarks, Swiss francs
or Euros is indeed somewhat arbitrary, but is simply to indicate what the
net asset value (or “NAV”) of the fund is - and hence its unit price -
in terms that an investor can comprehend at a glance and without onerous
calculations.
This price can then be evaluated in terms of his base
currency (which may be the same as or different from the denomination of
the fund in question), and he can see whether he has made a real profit or
not, both as regards the price he originally paid for it in his base
currency, and what it is really worth now, either in that same currency or
any other he may now be concerned with - such as Thai baht.
So when planning to buy or sell units in a fund which
is priced in a currency other than your base currency, and plan to remit
the proceeds of that investment at some later stage to Thailand, you
won’t necessarily be taking a bath in baht.
If you have any comments or queries on this article, or
about other topics concerning investment matters, write to Leslie Wright,
c/o Family Money, Pattaya Mail, or fax him directly on (038) 232522 or
e-mail him at [email protected].
Further details and back articles can be accessed on his firm’s website
on www.westminsterthailand.com.
Leslie Wright is Managing Director of Westminster Portfolio Services
(Thailand) Ltd., a firm of independent financial advisors providing advice
to expatriate residents of the Eastern Seaboard on personal financial
planning and international investments.
The Computer Doctor
by Richard Bunch
From: Claus Jorgensen, Laem Chabang:
I am using Easy Acc accounting software and wonder if there is a way to get
the workstations to share a network printer.
Computer Doctor replies: From my experience with this
product, it does not coexist comfortably within a Windows environment. That
said, it is possible to get some but not all functions to respond over the
network. It is necessary to make these changes to the printer settings
though. Open the Printer Settings, then select the Details Tab, click the
Port Settings button and then uncheck the Spool MS DOS Print Jobs and Check
Port State Before Printing boxes.
It is often more practicable, though, to set up a second
instance of the printer for use by Easy Acc which is put through either a
manual or automatic switch box. The original instance remaining unchanged
for traditional network use.
From Peter Mitchell: A variation on a frequent topic.
I am using the Spanish version of Windows 95, but by downloading Thai fonts,
etc., and changing the predetermined language to US English I am able to
type in Thai within Microsoft Works (not Word as in Thailand unfortunately).
So far so good.
With IE5, I installed Thai text support. Within Outlook
Express under Options I have changed Compose Font to DB Thai Text fixed,
within Internet Explorer under Internet Options I have added Thai under
Language and under Fonts changed to DB Thai Text fixed. In neither case,
however, have I managed to change what I call Scandinavian vowels into Thai
script. Have I omitted an important step? Any help you can provide would be
appreciated.
Computer Doctor replies: I think you’ve nearly got
there. I believe what you have missed is within read, changing the language
to Thai and then the proportional font as DB Thai Text. Believe me it does
work, I’ve had it running with many languages, including Russian. If it
still doesn’t work, please let me know.
Send your questions or comments to the Pattaya Mail at 370/7-8 Pattaya
Second Road, Pattaya City, 20260 or Fax to 038 427 596 or E-mail to [email protected].
Successfully Yours: Hans
Tietze
by Mirin MacCarthy
It is not often you meet a 43 year old German Engineering
graduate, dyed in the wool motorcycle racer who makes pies. This then is the
story of Hans Tietze.
Hans is the son of a professional musician father and a
gifted interpreter mother. Although raised in a medieval town, Lemgo in
Germany, he was almost literally born on a motorcycle. “My father was a
motorbike enthusiast too, and I was born on the saddle on my parents bike ride
to Dresden in 1956.”
With such a start to life, it was not long before Hans,
too, got his first bike. He was 15 years old and became the proud owner of a
broken down old BSA Gold Star which cost him the equivalent of 1000 Baht. He
also had to push it home, a distance of 15 kilometres. Such is the dedication
of a true motorcycle enthusiast.
Hans completed his secondary education and then attended
Lemgo Technical College for four years, completing a degree in Mechanical
Engineering, ignoring his father’s advice to become a cook.
During his undergraduate years, he supported his motorcycle
habit by driving taxis at night and cooking in an Italian restaurant at
weekends. This stood him in good stead, because he soon found out after
graduation that there was a glut of engineers at that time, so he ended up as
the manager of a steak house and an Italian restaurant.
After three years in the restaurant business the bikes
called to him again and he opened up a small motorcycle shop in Lemgo. There
he fixed bikes, made fairings and sold accessories and then took the bold step
of taking on a Honda Dealership.
Around this time he also became interested in body
building, coming third in the German Championships in 1987. But again the
bikes got in the way and he went racing. “I was too old and too big, but I
went O.K.”
There was something else that attracted Hans’ eye. That
was Thailand. He had been on a vacation here in 1979 and in 1989 he felt that
Germany had little more to offer him, so he came back to this country.
Like so many before him have found, even though Thailand is
an inexpensive place to visit, when you live here full time you can soon watch
your money shrinking. Hans knew he was going to have to do something quickly.
With a laugh he said, “It was either bikes or cooking.” Bikes won again
and he started a big bike rental on Beach Road. After two years he found that
he “got more scrap back than motorcycles” so he began looking for
something new.
That turned out to be a job as a mechanical engineer in
Sriracha, after bumping into a guy in a bar who told him of the opening. So
finally, 14 years after he received his degree, he went to work for someone
else in his mechanical engineering specialty.
The engineering has stood him in good stead, taking him
around the world to Dubai, Indonesia, Malaysia, India, the Philippines and
Korea. However, the economic crash in 1997 saw him again with no job or
immediate prospects.
This time the choice of bikes or cooking came down on the
side of cooking. Through a series of fortuitous events, his Thai wife (Ong)
ended up buying all the shares of a pie business. With his knowledge and
experience, Hans became a consultant for his wife’s new venture, Pie
Paradise. That business is now going ahead in leaps and bounds, with Ong
supplying many supermarkets as well as private orders.
With construction engineering looking up again, Hans was
called back, but when he finishes his next engineering contract he is heading
for the kitchen. He is planning on opening a different style of restaurant in
Pattaya. Cooking will win again, though Hans does admit, “I’m too old for
bikes!” He did add, however, “Bikes are like a drug. You get addicted to
them.”
So what does an ex-bike racer do for a hobby? He listens to
music, grooms his Persian cats and breeds tropical fish. Not what you would
have imagined, but then Hans is just that little bit different, too.
He has very little regrets about his varied life. “I’ve
got the best Thai girl I’ve ever met. I really wouldn’t change anything,
though I probably should have listened to older people when I was young. They
have more experience than you have.”
Hans sat back and thought about the last statement and then added,
“You’ve got to keep your own directions and goals, too.” I have the
feeling that there would not have been too many older people who could have
changed his directions. Hans Tietze is very much his own man, with his fingers
in many pies!
Snap Shots: Outstanding
Landscapes!
by Harry Flashman
There is a tendency to become very complacent and sloppy when
taking landscapes. There’s Buddha Mountain and some scrubby bushland and
that’s it. Take one frame and go home. Unfortunately, taking a good landscape
requires just as much thought, creative ability and visual “eye” as taking
any other type of photograph. However, owing to the sheer size of it, taking
landscapes can be even more difficult.
The first aspect to master is just sheer composition. The
golden rule is to include some foreground interest as well as all the other
items in the shot. Sharp foreground items like fence posts, bushes or even old
farm equipment gives depth and scale to the photograph. The other good thing is
that the foreground item will draw the eye into the picture.
It is always best to avoid putting the horizon line slap bang
in the centre of the photograph, so tilt the camera to only have about 25% of
the picture sky, and even experiment by making the sky 75% of the picture you
see in the viewfinder.
Another very interesting variant in landscape shots is to
turn your camera 90 degrees and take the landscape in the “portrait”
(vertical) mode. Of course, the rule about where to place the horizon still
stands!
Landscapes should also be very sharp, right the way through
from the foreground to the very back of the scene. The way to ensure this is to
run as small an aperture as you can. Harry recommends f16 to f22.
Now this will give you slow shutter speeds, especially in
lower light situations, so this is one time where you really need your tripod.
The slow shutter speed will also give you that flowing look to moving water,
such as streams or rivers. Additionally it gives you an interesting and
different representation of waves, again imparting a sense of movement.
Time of day is particularly important for landscapes. Early
morning for that cold blue light and late afternoon for the warm glow. Get those
into a landscape and you are starting to put together a good photograph.
Another little trick is not to pack up and go home as soon as
the sun disappears. There is often enough light to catch some stunningly
coloured different kinds of shots after sundown. You can really put in some
creative flair at this time by lighting the foreground, while exposing for the
rear ground. You can do this by shining your car’s headlights on the
aforementioned fence posts, bushes or old farm equipment. The yellow light on
the foreground item will make for a very pleasant effect.
Even when the sun’s influence has completely gone, you can
still take interesting shots with just the moon as the light source. You will
get an eerie atmospheric feel to shots taken that way. The exposure details are
a bit “hit and miss” I’m afraid, but try taking some shots at 5 minutes
time exposure. You’ll get something different, I’ll guarantee.
Even bad weather should not put you off having a go at some
landscapes. On a completely foul day try putting some black and white film in
the camera and see what you get. You may be very surprised with the end result.
Another little wriggle is to use the flash when taking shots in the rain. You
can stop the rain drops as bright splashes of light in an otherwise grey shot.
So you can see, with a little creative thought you can manipulate the final
landscape images in many varied ways. Not all will be successful, but some shots
will turn out to be show stoppers. Try some of these tricks this weekend.
Modern Medicine: Please
help me!
by Dr Iain Corness
A colleague mentioned the other day that he had seen a
TV programme on the “Power of Prayer” and did I think prayer had any
part in western medicine? I omitted to say the obvious, that all doctors
have at some time said inwardly, “I hope and pray this one will get
better, keep breathing, pick up, stop bleeding” or similar, but instead
referred him to an article I had just read in the scientific journals.
“Can Faith make you whole?” was the title and it
was a well researched piece with a review of accepted western medical
literature. It began with a discourse showing that conventional medical
treatments were good with what the author called “war situations” -
the fight against bacteria, repairing wounds and replacing damaged organs.
However, the ability of western medicine in the arena of chronic disease,
stress and ageing was not as good, or clear cut.
It is well known that many sufferers of chronic
ailments feel that they are so poorly treated by conventional medical
wisdom that they take to ‘alternative’ therapies in droves - and spend
a fortune at the same time. Make no mistake - alternative medicine costs
the world population billions of dollars.
Enter the “wild card” - religion. A 1995 study of
232 heart surgery patients showed that those who professed to a faith and
drew comfort from it had one third the death rate of the non-believers. In
1996 the National Institute of Ageing in America, in a study of 4000
elderly people, found that those who attended religious services were less
depressed and physically healthier than those who did not.
Dr. Herbert Benson of the Harvard Medical School claims
that patients can overcome a number of stress related diseases by
practising a simple form of meditation. He states that the act of
focussing the mind reverses the effects of the harmful fight/flight stress
hormones. This in turn reduces blood pressure, heart rate, muscle tension,
stops insomnia and lessens pain. That’s not a bad effort for something
that doesn’t require expensive pills and potions!
Dr. Benson postulates that praying works the same way
by reducing stress hormones. Since stress hormones have a negative
influence on your immunological defence, it can then be said that
religious activities like prayer and meditation have a positive effect on
the system that protects the body from infections and even cancer.
The end result of this investigation would propose that
religion (and sorry, it did not matter which one!) and meditation (again,
irrespective of the type or method) has a beneficial effect on the health
of the believer.
The author of the review article, Sanjiva Wijesinha, finishes on the
note that this beneficial effect “... is something the people in the
non-western world have been aware of for a long time.” Makes you think,
doesn’t it? Or even just a little bit humble.
Dear
Hillary,
My mate’s girlfriend has an awful lot of facial hair. I swear that
sometimes when I see her in the mornings she’s even worse than usual (we
all live in the same house). My mate’s started to act a little
“funny” recently too and I am worried that there is something going on
that I don’t understand, or don’t want to understand. What should I
do?
Harry
Dear Harry,
If you really don’t want to know, and/or can’t live with it - then
move out.
Dear Hillary,
My Thai wife and I finally managed to find a nice house to rent in a nice
part of town. Everything was going well till the lights went out in one
room the other week. Now she says there are ghosts in the house and
refuses to live in it. I have had to rent a condo to give her somewhere to
sleep. Does she really believe there are ghosts in the house? Any
suggestions you have will be welcomed, as I cannot keep on paying two
rents and I will lose my deposit if I leave the house!
Casper
Dear Casper,
I have an overwhelming certainty that your wife does believe the house is
haunted.
The only thing you can do is have the monks bless the house. Or consult a
fortune teller or spirit medium if you can find one, whom you can consult
and of course pay to exorcise the ghosts. Ask around among Thai friends.
Dear Hillary,
I broke up with my ex-girlfriend three months ago. I thought she took it
very well and moved out with no complaint. Recently I have noticed that
she has been following me. If I turn round she will go into a shop, or
start talking to someone else. In the bar I go to I have found she has
been asking the girls there about me too. I am getting nervous. Should I
worry or will she get over it?
Steve
Dear Steve.
I would definitely be worried and watching my back. And perhaps my front
as well. Perhaps a little “severance pay” might help.
Dear Hillary,
My husband has never liked Thai food. Even when we were in America and
knew we were being transferred over here, he refused to try. About two
months ago he had to go to Bangkok for the weekend and since then he has
been going out for long lunches to have Thai food with his co-workers. He
says this is important to give a sense of company spirit and solidarity. I
do like Thai food, yet he never eats Thai with me at night when I want it.
I don’t want to appear anxious, but should I be?
Anxious Anne
Dear Anxious,
Appear to be anything but anxious. I’m not sure if you are worried by
your husband’s sudden and inconsistent change of diet or his whereabouts
at lunchtimes. If it is the latter then finding out where he goes at lunch
times will either allay or confirm your fears. Then you can decide what
your options are. If, however, you really want him to share Thai food with
you, either cook it for him yourself or go out to a Thai restaurant
together.
Dear Hillary,
Is there such a thing as the Imelda Marcos Syndrome. If so, my
girlfriend’s got it. Every time we go out she wants to try on new shoes
(and get me to buy them too). I don’t have the Marcos millions at my
disposal. Is this a usual thing with Thai women?
Ferdinand
Dear Ferdinand,
Yes there is definitely an Imelda Marcos syndrome alive and well in the
breast of most Thai women. May I suggest you do not pay for any more
shoes.
GRAPEVINE
Absolutely
innocent
A Sri Racha man has been accused of breaking
into a local school last Saturday evening, but he has a cast iron
alibi. He told police he was robbing a Pattaya gold shop at the very
same time. He is now awaiting trial on the second charge.
Everyone’s favorite
Amongst the latest T shirt logos and car
bumper stickers to hit Beach Road: “Eat American Lamb Because Ten
Million Coyotes Can’t Be Wrong.” “If Men Could Have Abortions It
Would Be A Sacrament.” But the best seller proclaims “Visualize
Whirled Peas” which is apparently a best phonetic effort at
Visualize World Peace.
Danger man at work
Rayong factory workers are dumbfounded after
health and safety expert Michael Joynson turned up to demonstrate a
new lift safety drill only to fall fifteen feet down the open shaft.
He had isolated the lift in the shaft and, using a special key, opened
the steel doors. The accident happened when Mr. Joynson turned round
angrily to tell a machinist to extinguish a lit cigarette which was
contrary to the company’s hazards at work policy. Paramedics were
summoned after a security guard heard the consultant moaning on top of
basement trash sacks.
That’s entertainment
The show could not go on at a top Pattaya
hotel after a farang comedy turn collapsed in laughter at his own
jokes. Crisco The Clown, from the Isle of Wight, arrived forty five
minutes late for a children’s party and began to perform his magic
tricks backwards and to belly laugh at his one-liner wisecracks. A
resident doctor said Crisco had come under the influence of a bag of
Magic Mushrooms which his agent had inadvertently brought from Newport
in his hand luggage.
Motorbike thieves
Farangs are particularly at risk of falling
prey to motorcycle bandits. The scam arises when you are slowly riding
a motorbike. A second motorbike overtakes you and the pillion
passenger snatches whatever is in your basket. Not too bad if the
contents are a bottle of milk and a loaf. A different story if a
stolen bag contains your passport, credit cards and cash.
Environmental disaster
From AFP. Department of Conservation
botanists in Chiang Mai had spent years searching for an orchid that
was thought to be extinct. After four days in a peat bog in search of
the tiny flower Corybas Carseii, the demoralized botanists paused for
a lunch break. Afterwards, they discovered they had been sitting on
it. |
Camp comedy
A serious attempt to improve Pattaya’s
cultural life by starting an amateur dramatics society has had to be
abandoned. Expat Rene Eschaus organized an initial meeting but
declared it a failure. The only people to turn up were sixteen out of
work khatoey cabaret entertainers.
Amazing Bangkok airport
A departing tourist had his suitcase
searched after the x-ray machine noticed a hunting knife lurking in
the luggage. The offending weapon was taken out and dispatched to a
second machine which was meant to bind it neatly in a series of layers
of strong adhesive tape. Only trouble was the machine spun out of
control and refused to let go of a very sticky and untidy package. The
tourist was asked, “Have you got a knife to cut this?”
Lethal weapon thwarted
A local tree feller has been sentenced to
three years in prison after holding eleven people to ransom in Rayong.
He charged into a hotel lobby, wielding a huge electric chain saw, and
demanded money and valuables from the security deposit boxes. He was
immediately pinned to the floor by security staff who noticed he had
forgotten to plug his machine into the mains.
British boob
A Manchester couple, who voted Labour at the
last election, proudly bought a telephone receiver which patriotically
displayed the sticker “This product qualifies for the Buy British
Campaign.” A neighbour, examining this latest piece of technological
wizardry, said, “Did you know it says Made in Thailand on the
back?”
Unlucky for some
Let’s hope that the new Bangkok automatic
car washes don’t hit Pattaya for a while. One unlucky farang stuck
his head out of his car window to put a token in the meter but
accidentally pushed his vehicle’s electric window button. The glass
then wound up and trapped his head as the Corolla majestically
proceeded on its extremely wet journey. Simon Shawcross, a hairdresser
from Brighton, commented afterwards that he did not particularly
recommend the cheapest blow-dry in town. |
Dining Out: Kinnaree
by Miss Terry Diner
Kinnaree is one of those restaurants that has only opened
recently, but is already very well known to the local Thai people in Pattaya,
but perhaps not as much by the ex-pats. Situated on North Pattaya Road, it is
around 100 metres from the Dolphin roundabout and on the same side as City Hall.
Adequate parking is also available on the side street that runs across the front
of the restaurant.
It is actually a very large restaurant, with three separate
enclosed dining areas, one of which is a Suki room and two brightly lit outside
eateries. Heavy wooden chairs and tables are set in a semi-garden situation with
planter boxes scattered strategically around. The obligatory large aquaria are
outside with prawns, fish and crabs having their final swim. A surreptitious
look into the kitchen area showed it to be spotlessly clean.
The main thrust is towards seafood with Sea Bass, Garoupa and
Tabtim, but perusal of the menu showed that there was a healthy mix of
vegetarian dishes as well a section with Isaan food. The menu itself is in Thai
with English subtitles. Unfortunately, the heading on the different sections
does not have an English translation, so I cannot give you the usual blow by
blow menu description. However, the average dish is between 80 -150 Baht, other
than the seasonal price by weight items.
Like many Thai restaurants, the beverage list is not
extensive and basically covers whiskeys and large bottles of beer. They have a
wine list as well, which is not bad in its range, even including a Katnook Cab
Sav, but at a 1994 vintage it may have passed its prime (if indeed it is still
available).
We were joined by Neera Sirisampan, the Assistant Director
from the Bangkok-Pattaya Hospital, and so between the three of us we chose a
Pork with Oyster sauce (120 Baht), an interesting Four Vegetables in Gravy sauce
(150 Baht), Oysters and Egg Hot Plate (150 Baht) and a Steamed Chicken in
Chinese wine (150 Baht).
The vegetarian dish arrived first and had broccoli, white
asparagus, bok choi and fat Chinese mushrooms in the medium gravy. This was very
pleasant and the asparagus was particularly succulent.
The steamed chicken is a cold dish, which was not what we had
expected, but then again, perhaps it was lost in the English translation. It was
actually very piquant and was madame’s favourite of the evening.
The pork dish was large, served hot, but the meat a little
dried up for my liking. It came with carrots and onions and was perfectly edible
without being something to write home about. In retrospect, a trifle bland.
Our last dish was brought to the table with some ceremony, as
befits a sizzling hot plate. Crammed full of oysters in a bubbling sauce, with
wisps of egg, cooking as we watched. Small flecks of red gave warning that this
was a spicy choice. Not too hot, however, but definitely one with a bite. The
oysters were plump and flavoursome and the sauce very complementary to their
taste. Neera and I both gave this one the top marks of the evening.
The Kinnaree Restaurant is worthwhile adding to your seafood list and the Hot
Plate Oysters are definitely worth ordering. Interesting!
Animal Crackers: Pepe Le
Peu
by Mirin MacCarthy
If you do not live in America, your entire knowledge of
this interesting little animal probably is restricted to the cartoon
character, Pepe Le Peu. This romantic little fellow with the black and
white striped tail loses all his trysts because of his bad smell. Poor
Pepe!
Skunks’ real name is Maphitis mephitis, and they are
carnivores. The scientific name when translated means “poisonous
vapor”, so Pepe Le Peu is right on target so far.![](animal.gif)
Skunks are also true native Americans, as that is the
only region of the world where they live. They are hated by some people
and everyone is afraid of their ability to squirt their foul smelling
spray. Let me assure you that Pepe is very accurate and can hit a bulls
eye up to 4 metres away!
On either side of the anus, the skunks have two
“musk” glands, each of which has an aiming nipple. When Pepe wishes to
use his aromatic powers he will warn you by turning his rear end toward to
intruder, raising his tail, and pattering his front feet. If that
doesn’t scare off the intruder, the skunk hisses, spreads its haunches,
and sprays with awesome accuracy. It can spray repeatedly 7 or 8 times if
necessary. Amazingly, skunks do not use their unique talent on each other.
However, there is one creature that is immune to the skunk’s scent and
that is the American Horned Owl. This bird’s dinner is striped skunks
and they hunt Pepe and his friends at night.
Another interesting skunk fact is that they are
resistant to snake venom. They can actually survive 10 times the amount of
venom needed to kill another animals of similar size.
Skunks are larger than the average house cat with the
body 13-18 inches long with a 7-10 inch tail. They weigh around 9 pounds
on average, but some have been recorded as weighing up to 28 pounds.
Mother skunks generally have 4-5 in her litter and a
skunk’s life span is around 7-10 years. Although they are nocturnal they
are a fairly sociable animal, though the adult males tend to be solitary
in summer.
Being carnivores their diet is mainly insects and small
mammals but they will eat seasonal berries, nuts, fallen fruit, and
birds’ eggs.
Some people in America keep them as pets, but these
have had their scent glands surgically removed. It is questionable whether
wild animals such as these should be domesticated, as a de-scented skunk
has no chance in the wild if it ever escapes.
Likewise, de-clawing any animal is a barbarous practice and should be
outlawed. If all this surgery has to be done to keep them as “pets”,
it is inhumane treatment of defenseless animals.
Auto Mania:
World’s Fastest Ambulance!
by Dr. Iain Corness
When Michael Schumacher had his much publicised
accident at Silverstone a few weeks back, did anyone see just how long it
took for the medical help to be on the spot? The answer was 85 seconds,
which is quite amazing.
That was the length of time it took to get the FIV with
Professor Sid Watkins, the Formula 1 chief medico on board, to
Schumacher’s Ferrari. Watkins reports that Schumacher’s first words
were, “Hello Sid, it’s just my leg, it’s not a big problem.”
Watkins goes on to say that he was most impressed with Schumacher’s
demeanour and his politeness. “He was very, very cool. He’s a class
act.”![](auto.jpg)
From the theoretical point of view it had been
estimated that a driver should be able to withstand such an impact and it
was heartening for the boffins to see they had got it right. Through all
the testing in the laboratories it had been worked out that if you hit a
three layer tyre barrier at 120 kph the G forces in the cockpit are
survivable. While no-one wants to see broken limbs, to be able to survive
such a head-on, at 107 kph in Schumacher’s case, is a huge improvement
in primary driver safety.
When I started motor racing in 1965 there was no
consideration given to driver safety at all. We did not have seat belts or
even roll-over bars. Driving suits were not compulsory and were only thin
cotton anyway. Some of the circuits we raced on had barbed wire fences
along the edges of the track to stop you driving into the crowd! Contrast
that with today. My last helmet cost 25,000 Baht and my fire resistant
race suit the same. Even the 3 inch wide six point quick release seat
belts cost an arm and a leg, metaphorically of course! It was Stirling
Moss who said that he could remember back to when motor racing was
dangerous and sex was safe. Things have certainly gone full circle,
haven’t they.
Autotrivia Quiz
Lots of stabs in the dark for the worlds first
production mid-engine exotic sports car. It was brought out in the mid 60s
after being shown in 1962 and of course it was the De Tomaso Vallelunga.
Now I have actually clapped eyes on one of these little jiggers at the
1966 motor show in Geneva. A much more youthful and libidinous Dr. Iain
with his mate, mentioned a couple of weeks ago - the Aussie motor noter
John Weinthal, had wangled their way into the Salon d’Automobile and I
was rather captivated by the De Tomaso stand. Not by the vehicular
offerings, I’m afraid (exciting enough as they were) but by the
stunningly beautiful Mrs. De Tomaso. Dark hair, flashing eyed, Italian
stunner with a great superstructure. For a couple of days I made daily
dribbling pilgrimages to the De Tomaso stand until I had obviously been
noticed leering and salivating at the aforementioned Mrs. De T by one only
Alessandro De T and I beat a hasty retreat. That about sums up my personal
experiences with a De Tomaso, other than leaning on Rusty French’s
Pants-tearer at a race meeting in Oz. However, just to show you that you
get a little bit more than sheer trivia, here’s the real Vallelunga
story.
The Vallelunga was De Tomaso Automobili’s first
production model. It was named after the Vallelunga race circuit, where De
Tomaso used to test their F3 race cars. The mid engine chassis design and
4 wheel independent suspension came from the F3’s as did the North-South
mid engine placement with the Hewland gear box on behind being used as a
stressed member for the mounting of the rear suspension; standard race car
practice at the time.
Vallelunga numero uno was shown in 1962 and was an open
roadster with aluminium bodywork. The next three cars (some say five) were
built by Fissore and were alloy bodied coupes. When full production
finally started Ghia were given the contract (because Mr. De T was trying
to take control of Ghia) and the bodies were manufactured in fibreglass.
The Vallelunga engine was not exotic, being the
ubiquitous Ford Kent 1500cc OHV four, delivering approximately 100
horsepower with twin side-draft Weber carburettors. Later cars were fitted
with 1600cc units, although it is believed a few received the Lotus Twin
Cam variants.
Almost all were LHD, though one RHD model did get to
the UK and was fitted with a Twink. That car has been totally rebuilt and
is the only Vallelunga in Britain. Enough trivia on Vallelungas!
So to this week’s question. Eddie Jordan is known as
the first automobile manufacturer to make use of sophisticated advertising
techniques to sell his product. What model did he advertise in “Vanity
Fair” magazine? This is not as easy as you might think! First correct
answer to email [email protected] or fax to 427 596 wins this
week’s free beer.
By the way, the first correct answer for the Mini
Cooper question was K. Noppagan from PMCI and first in with the Mille
Miglia (answer last week) was Hawaii Pete Cabrey, who wants more American
iron quiz questions. I’ll see what I can dredge up, Peter!
Silly Season almost over
The annual driver swaps and new pairings are now almost
over. Not so many changes, nor many “new” faces. The most surprising
aspect is that so many teams have hung on to some fairly non competitive
drivers.
The line up for Y2K looks like being, Ferrari - M.
Schumacher and Barichello; McLaren - Hakkinen and Coulthard; Jordan -
Frentzen and Trulli; Williams - R. Schumacher and Zanardi; Benetton -
Fisichella and Wurz; Sauber - Diniz and Salo; Arrows - de la Rosa and
perhaps Panis; Stewart Ford (Jaguar) - Irvine and Herbert; Prost - Alesi
and F3000 champion Heidfeld; Minardi - Badoeur and Gene; BAR - Villeneuve
and Zonta.
I reckon Messrs Zanardi, Wurz, Herbert and Zonta are
lucky to retain their F1 seats. Experience must be counting for more than
sheer speed.
Monza this weekend
It was hoped that the return of Michael Schumacher would be this
weekend and the world is waiting to see if he can set the tracks alight
again. I am sure he will WHEN he comes back, but it does not look like
being at Monza this weekend. See you at Delaney’s in front of the big
screen for all the Eff Wun action.
Copyright 1998 Pattaya Mail Publishing Co.Ltd.
370/7-8 Pattaya Second Road, Pattaya City, Chonburi 20260, Thailand
Tel.66-38 411 240-1, 413 240-1, Fax:66-38 427 596; e-mail: [email protected]
Updated by Chinnaporn Sangwanlek. |
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